Souda x Gundham (soudam)

All of the Homo

I refuse to believe it.  It's not masculine.  It's unnatural.  It's not me!  People will make fun of me...  I will be shunned.  No, no, no, this can't be happening!

I groaned and lay down on my bed looking up at the ceiling.  Why was I having these feelings, especially for another man?  Especially one that hated my guts.  Why would I love him.

I groaned again and turned over onto my stomach.  Kazuichi Souda.  That was his name.  My crush.  But why?  He hated me.  He thought that I was his love rival in the battle for the affection of Sonia Nevermind.  Besides, he's straight.  What if he's homophobic?  What if he hates me even more than he already does?  This was making things so much more complicated than they needed to be.

I sighed again as I heard a knock on my cabin door.  "Come in," I said, not caring if the person had come to kill me or not.  If they were, at least it would excuse me from admitting my affection to Kazuichi.  The door creaked open and there stood my friend, Sonia Nevermind.

"Oh hello Sonia," I greeted her in my deep voice.  "Why hello to you as well Gundham," she replied in her very soft and mannerly way.  "I just stopped by to give you back Cham-P.  He must have run away because I found him in Akane's cabin when I was visiting her." 

She held out a very large, fluffy hamster in front of her.  "Cham-P!," I cried as I plucked him out of her hands.  "That's where you've been all this time!"  Sonia chuckled.  "I do know how much you adore your animals."  I nodded.  "But there's someone I love more," I said under my breath.  But she caught it.

"What did you say?," she asked politely, although I could hear a sense of excitement in her voice.  I knew that she didn't expect it to be her.  I knew that she was a lesbian (for plot sake.... I'm not going to do much with it though.  It's just to avoid the possibility of extra drama coming from her being jealous or something), and would not try to hit on her.

I blushed a deep shade of red.  "Oh, somebody has a crush," she teased as she poked my cheek.  "So who is it?," she asked excitedly as she, leaving no trace of her polite and mannerly composure.  "Kavuikisuda," I replied, my voice muffled by my scarf.  She looked at me quizzically.  "What was that?," she asked, urging me to repeat it. 

"Kazuichi Souda!," I said, louder than I needed to, my voice more clear this time.  She looked shocked for a moment.  "B-but he hates you," she reasoned somewhat defensively.  "I know I know!," said.  "But I just can't help the way I feel!" 

She sighed.  "I know..."  I looked at her sadly.  She wanted me to have someone who would love me just as much as I loved them, and not to go after a relationship that would never come to be. 

"You should at least tell him," she suggested.  I froze at the idea.  "He'll just reject me," I said sadly.  "Well you'll never know if you don't try," she urged me.  I sighed.  "Fine."

-time skip brought to you by Gundam's anxiety medication-

I saw Kazuichi talking to Hajime and Fuyuhiko on the beach in front of the beach house.  I approach them awkwardly, and they see me.  "Hi Gundham!," Hajime greets me cheerfully.  "Yo, what up?," Fuyuhiko said.  Kazuichi just glared at me, and I winced.  This wasn't going to turn out well.

"Hello fiends," I returned, trying to keep up my composure.  "I was wondering if I could speak to the mortal, Kazuichi, for a few minutes?"  Kazuichi groaned but complied as he grudgingly walked away from his friends with me. 

Once we were out of earshot he turned to me.  "What do you want?," he asked, annoyed.  I started tugging at my shirt collar, sweating like crazy.  "Um... um well you see...," I started, feeling so anxious that I felt as if I were about to throw up.  "Come on spit it out dude," Kazuichi said, now frustrated.

"WellIkindahaveacrushonyouandiloveandandyeah," I said really fast, blushing hard.  He looked confused.  "Say that again please?," he requested.  "I... I love you...," I admitted, looking down at my feet, ashamed.  He looked shocked.  "Y-you do?"  I nodded my head. 

Then he did something that completely took me off guard.  He hugged me.  I hugged him back, completely shocked.  "I love you too," he said.  "W-what?!," I asked/yelled, very confused.  He sighed.

"I always thought that you had a crush on Ms. Sonia, so I pretended to have a crush on her too to make you jealous, and I acted like I hated you because I was... hurt I guess...," he admitted, looking sad.  I was about to cry.  The man I loved... loved me back?

A/N: Horray for bad writing!  Hope you liked!  Chapter two will come out soon!