Secrets In Silence ✓ [Secrets Book 1]

[Chapter Nine] Addison

He jumped ad I could tell is startled him, but he recovered.

"Please don't go" I signed before I could think anything through, I didn't want him to go. I felt safe with him. For the first time in my life I actually felt safe and I didn't want that to go away.

"Okay, can I sleep with my shirt off?" he asked and I knew that boys typically did that so I agreed, I knew that I got hot at night and I didn't want to make him uncomfortable.

"I'll be right back, I'm going to go get some shorts from Asher, okay?" he asked and I nodded.

As soon as the door was shut I got up to change too. I walked into the bathroom and made sure to take off any make up and wash my face before changing into my typical shorts and tank top. Tossed the dirty clothes in the hamper and got set on putting up my clothes while I waited, I wondered what was taking so long, but I just kept cleaning.

When he came back into the room he looked at me and smiled before it disappeared.

"Addie," he looked down and my eyes shot to the scars on my legs. I panicked and almost dove into bed "You know there are other ways" I stated when she cut me off.

"I didn't do this to myself" I felt the strong need to defend myself, but when he froze so did I. I didn't think about what I was revealing with that. I didn't want to talk about it. I really didn't.

"Can I still stay?" He asked me and I looked at him, wondering if he was going to drop it just like that, and when I realized that yes he would, he didn't want to push me to tell him anything, I scooted over and made some room for him.

He lay down in the bed, keeping space between us to make me comfortable. We were both lying on our sides just staring at each other. And I scooted closer. I wanted to be closer to him.

I was unsettled about this fact, but I brushed it away for now, I could think about it tomorrow.

He moved so I could lay with him and I rested my head on his chest and wrapped my one arm around his stomach before I moved my leg up to rest between his, It was comfortable and I liked it. I haven't felt this comfortable going to sleep in years.

It was still new and I tensed up at the contact, but the longer he just laid there still, just looking at me, the easier I found it to relax into him.

"Can I touch you?" He spoke and I freaked out, did he think that I would let him do that to me, I mean I barley was comfortable with him- "I didn't mean it like that" he cut off my train of thought. Of course he didn't. He wouldn't. I nodded.

He slowly moved his hand to run his fingers through my hair and I held my breath when he other hand moved down to my knee. That one freaked me out the most. But he didn't move his hand up, just had it sitting there comfortably.

"Is this okay?" I nodded slowly, because that fact that he would ask really made it okay for me.

He didn't take the control away from me, he was giving it back. That's all I ever wanted in my life; To make my own decisions, to be able to have a choice in what I wanted to do. I was tired of being told who to be, what classes to take, who to date, what to wear.

I was tired of my parents telling me when I could and could not talk, I was tired of them forcing me to do things I didn't want to do. they never once asked what I wanted, they never cared to get to know what I was good at.

My dad just decided that I was adequate enough to fit into his plans, and set me on track to be a lawyer even though I absolutely hated it.

They don't know me, because they don't care to. They took away every ounce of free will the second I could comprehend what was right and wrong. I was obedient and I tried to be a good daughter, but it was never enough for them.