Hate That I Love You

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'That's how much I love you, that's how much I need you. And I can't stand you. Must everything you do make me wanna smile? Can I not like you for a while? But you won't let me, you upset me, girl. And then you kiss my lips, all of a sudden I forget that I was upset. Can't remember what you did. But I hate it.'

Hate That I Love You by Rihanna

-day eight- 

My eyes opened against the harsh sunlight from above, and I quickly snapped them shut again. The ache in my head was pounding, causing me to reach my hand up to rub my temples, and groan when that seemed to help nothing.

Deciding to sit myself up, I looked around to see an empty buggy, full of our blankets but lacking a certain curly haired boy. I frowned, moving slowly as I sat up to look for him. I knew he couldn't have gone far, but I was still curious as to what caused him to leave the area.

Hopping off of the buggy, I noticed we were still sat in front of the bar we were at last night. Memories of the night before flashed through my mind, of Harry and I drinking his famous bloody marys, and falling over multiple times. I remembered walking with him back into the buggy, and how he had requested to try something with me, only to pull me in to cuddle him. I furrowed my eyebrows, wondering what that had meant to him. Was he simply cold? Or did he miss human contact? Or did he just want to hold me?

Did it mean something to him, or nothing at all?

When I heard a low murmur, I look to the right of the carriage to see Harry and one of the guards speaking in hushed tones. I wasn't sure where the guard was from, as I couldn't see the emblem on his chest, but I found myself wondering what Harry was doing with him.

I decided to head back into the carriage, in case the guard saw me and got suspicious. I didn't want to make myself known, and so I quietly crept back into the cart and grabbed an apple from our stash. Biting into it, I practically moaned at the flavor, not realizing just how hungry I was until this very moment.

I ignored the curiosity hanging in my chest as Harry came into view, his curls bouncing as he struggled to get into the cart.

"Oh, hey. You're up," he spoke quietly, and I smiled up at him, nervous for our encounter after last night.

"Hello. What were you doing?" I asked, and he looked behind him, before looking back at me.

"Asking for directions. I think the road forks off in a bit, and I wasn't sure whether to go left or right."

I nodded, his explanation making perfect sense, as I went back to my apple. I chewed it slowly, lost in my thoughts. How was I supposed to act around Harry, now? We didn't even do much, I just fell asleep wrapped in his arms, but it felt like so much more. Especially to me, since I wasn't used to human contact to begin with.

"We better get going, so we can travel a bunch. I reckon we could get two days worth of traveling in today, if you want," he offered, and I nodded, reaching for a random book and taking it with me to the front of the buggy. Harry sat next to me, an apple in his own hand, before grabbing the leads and gesturing Cookie off.

It was silent for a while, and there was a certain tension in the air, I could feel it. I couldn't tell you exactly what that tension was, whether it was a good or bad kind, all I know was that I had to break it before I went insane.

"Are we stopping for food anywhere?" I questioned, looking up from the book. I couldn't concentrate on any of the words, when Harry was sat right next to me.

"We can probably grab something to go when we see a place. But I don't think we should stop traveling. We wasted a lot of time last night."

"Oh, okay," I responded politely, nodding in agreement. We did waste time last night, but Harry was the one who wanted to do that. I didn't like that his sentence seemed to be a dig at me.

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