Chapter Two: Feelings

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"I'm sorry our trip was cut short," I said as we stood in the parking lot of the airport. I watched as Nox loaded our bags into the trunk of his FR-S.

"You don't have to apologize. Kai was right to bring us home early. Your health and well-being come before anything else," he replied as he closed the trunk, and turned to smile at me.

I looked down at my feet and wondered how being with Nox had felt so right just days ago, now felt strange and unnatural. I looked back up to see him still smiling at me, but his face was a mask of uncertainty. Wasn't it just days ago that I told him I'd always need him? I'd probably feel better about everything once I talked to him about our engagement. That had to be what was bothering me, right?

I returned his smile before walking over to my side of the car and getting in. I'm sure that everything will be fine.

***

Immediately after we arrived home I told Nox that we needed to talk. He didn't seem surprised, just worried.

"Did I do something wrong, Hikari?"

I bit my bottom lip. "No... but..."

Nox looked distressed as he pushed his hair back. "I knew something was wrong. You've been distant ever since...," he trailed off for a second not quite having finished his thought.

"I don't know. I love you but we've been together for just a minute, and even though I believe that we were fated to happen, I don't think I'm ready for this. I know that sounds crazy, I mean if I believe in us then there should be no problem with a change in status, right? But..."

"I understand." Nox's eyes were sad. "I just wanted to be with you forever."

"There will always be forever, but this just didn't feel organic and right. I don't know how to explain..." I couldn't find the right words to say--they were all coming out wrong.

"It didn't feel right?" He frowned.

"I appreciate all of the effort and time you must have put into planning in--not to mention the cost." I sighed as I slid the ring off my finger and pressed it into his open palm. "I don't deserve this. I'm sorry."

Nox looked down at the ring before he reached out and grabbed my hand. He placed the ring back into my hand and smiled at me sadly. "This was a gift, for you. I want you to keep it, even if you're not ready to be engaged. You can wear it when you're ready."

He closed my hand around the ring. "I wish I could be in your dreams again," he said sadly. "Is it OK if I go out for awhile? Visit with Tsubasa if he's available? I need to talk to a friend." He ran his hand over his face.

I nodded. I understood that he needed time away from me--to talk to someone other than me. After all, I was the one who just broke his heart.

Nox showered and asked me if I wanted anything before he left to meet up with Tsubasa.

"I'm fine," I assured him with a smile. "Have fun with Tsubi."

"Tsubi, huh?" he laughed softly before he kissed me softly on my cheek. "I'll tell him you said hi. I won't be out long..."

***

After Nox left I sat on the living room sofa with the intention of just chilling out but my phone rang as soon as I started to get comfortable. I wonder who it is, I thought as I answered without bothering to check the caller ID.

"Hello?"

"The flight tracker said that you guys landed safely but you didn't call me to check in." It was Kai. Obviously.

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