Right now I'm going through a heartbreak I never dated, but all my emotions are slowly killing me every second rn. I don't know who my friends are rn and people just like to seem to use me for their gaining benefits and I let them, I let them, but I don't know how to stop. Ben freaking played me twice and now I'm more messed up then ever trying to get over his stupid ass, but then there comes my friends and I don't know who's gonna be there in a month a year or even 5 years from now Bc I'm annoying, I'm dumb, I'm everything I need to be alone for eternity and maybe that's my destiny but I don't want that destiny. I'm suppose to be this strong girl inside even tho most of my smiles and happiness is fake and I want to hide from the world Bc nobody cares. People say, yeah I'll be here in 5 years, but I really want them to think, long and hard, Bc I want to know if I need to prepare myself or enjoy the little things. I'm just so tired of people that I'm actually thinking of isolating myself from people Bc it would probably be the best for the situations to come and it would all blow over and I will be there for me and me only. I'm just ready to be done, done with everything, everybody.
