I was once human (sterek)

Chapter 1

Stiles POV

I woke up to the annoying sound of my alarm clock blaring in my ear. Slowly, I rolled over and hit the damn thing as hard as I could to make the bloody thing shut up. I sat up in bed and took my pills for my depression and A.D.H.D which seemed to be getting a lot worse recently but I haven't told anyone just like I haven't told anyone I'm gay because I'm afraid, I'm afraid my father is going to hate me along with my friends which is absurd but true but hey, we all have our secrets right.

I walked to the bathroom and stripped out of my clothes and hopped in the shower. The warm feeling burned my skin at first but I got used to it. I started to think about school and how it was so draining to sit through the same lessons every week for years and that it was just making my depression worse than it was already. I was brought out of my thoughts by banging on the door "stiles are you alright you've been in the for 45 minutes? " shit,I thought, that means I have 10 minutes to get ready and to school " yes dad I'm fine I just got lost in thought " I say as I just out of the shower and wrap a towel around my waist. I look in the mirror and all I can think is fat, stupid, defenceless, weak, worthless. Those are the words I've described my self as for a while now and I've come to terms with the fact that they are all true- well that's going off what everyone tells me at school as well- I have a lot of insecurities and also being around a pack of well build werewolves didn't help at all.

I walked out of the bathroom and quickly slide on my boxer, back skinny jeans, white shirt with a plaid over shirt, blue converse and burgundy beanie ( yes he wears a beanie in this cos he looks gooooood in a beanie so deal with it) then walk downstairs and grab my keys, shout a bye to my dad and head out the front door. Yes i missed breakfast, I do everyday because I'm trying to lose weight as I'm told I need to by pretty much all the jocks at school. I currently weight 137 pounds and I started at 147 pounds so I'm doing aright. I head to my at and jump in then head for the school that I've come to hate over the years.

As I was walking through the school doors I got a message from Scott telling me to meet him at Derek's loft after school and that he wasn't coming today because of 'buisness' which I knew was aload of crap but I didn't complain. Scott's also been so full of himself since he got bit. I started thinking about how shit life is and how Scott would be nothing without that fuxking bite.

STIIILLLEES!!

A voice in my head rang out. It was so loud I thought it had burst my ear drums.

Stiiilllleess?

" what" I asked to the voice in my head

Why don't we play a game ?

What game ?

True or false , easy enough isn't it ?

Why not , you start

Scott's ignoring you

True

The packs also ignoring you

True

They're doing it because your useless

True

Your worthless

True

Your pathetic

True

Your weak

True

YOUR HUMAN !!!!

" TRUE" I yelled at the voice and I felt something wet drip on my hands that were in my lap, I had somehow managed to slide down the lockers and into a mess on the floor during the little game I just had, I looked up to the sky and noticed it wasn't raining then realised I was crying. I got off my ass and walked to my next lesson.

As I walked into my first lesson I realised that the whole pack wasn't here including Lydia and Allison. The pack had been more distant lately and it was like they were avoiding me but why would they do that ? Especially Scott, oh yeah it's because your pathetic - I thought to myself.

The school day seemed like it didn't want to end and, as the bell for lunch went I dragged myself to the cafeteria and sat on my own since I usually sat with the pack. As I ate my lunch I looked around the hall to see all the other teenagers who were laughing and joking around and I envied them. I couldn't help but think they all had it so easy, all they had to do was show up here everyday while I was stuck being the researcher and brains of a pack of werewolves. Don't get me wrong I love the pack but it can be so stressful sometimes. After an excruciating half an hour of being stuck in my own thoughts another bell went signalling the end of lunch.

The day finally came to an end after what felt like many days but was only actually a matter of hours. I got in my beloved jeep and threw my back pack in the back. I started my jeep and was off down the road towards Derek's loft. The curiosity was building up inside of me as to why the entire pack hadn't been at school and i hated going to pack meetings because they just threw me to the side until they needed an intelligent mind to find something out.

I pulled outside Derek's loft to see Derek's and Lydia's cars next to Scott's bike. I entered the building and decided to take the stairs to the top so I don't seem like a lazy git. As I reach the top I was out of breath which just proved how unhealthy I was. Again I got lost in my train of thought until I saw the large metal door start to slide open and there stood a pissed ( yet still VERY attractive looking) Derek "you gonna knock or just stand there " he said looking done with me already . The thing was I liked Derek ALOT but he absolutely hated me, you could tell by the looks he gave me everytime he sees me and he just makes me feel even more self-conscious because I mean look at him, he's an extremely attractive muscle man while I'm just me. " yeah sorry I got lost in thought " I say quietly, looking at the ground then I slip around him into the building so he can't see my face.

I go and sit on the couch to then be surrounded by Derek, Lydia, Allison, Scott, Boyd, Erica and Isaac. " stiles we need to tell you something" Isaac says" your out of the pack " Derek snaps at me. I'm utterly confused and then it hits me, they don't want me anymore because in the stupid human who is too pathetic and defenceless. "what?" I ask even though I know the answer but I'm just in a state of shock." I said your out of the pack now get out of my house " Derek snaps again which almost broke me because I liked him so much but I knew he hated me. " Scott?" I question but my voice breaks and tears start forming in my eyes. Scott doesn't look at me he just keeps looking at the ground. I look around and see everyone just staring at me expressionless. " get out " Derek says again and that truly broke me. I gave him one last look as I took off out of the loft and down the flights of stairs faster than ever. Tears are streaming in down my face as all I can think is not even my own friends want me anymore. Well former friends. I climbed inside my jeep, started it and raced home while silently crying

A/n

Aye so first chapter done , poor stiles 😢

1333 words