Dempeo : So over you.

Ready to lose.

Warning: Very sexually explicit

Ellen's POV:

I pull my crimson comforter around my small body trying to keep myself warm in this big bed. I turn to the clock and read 3:45 a.m. I haven't gotten a good nights sleep in months, I lay in bed and all my mind does is race. I lay in my empty bed in my empty house and wonder how one person could have so much emptiness. Laying here in my bed I find my mind wander back to that night and I cant help the tears that leak out of the corners of my eyes.

*flash backs in italics*

"Well everybody that's a wrap" Shonda exclaims as she pops the top off of a champagne bottle.

Our first season of Grey's Anatomy has officially finished filming and the entire cast and crew is riding the high that comes along with finishing a big project. Everyone is laughing, conversing and heavily drinking. I myself am about on my third or fourth glass of champagne and am feeling a bit tipsy.

I find my eyes scanning the crowd for Patrick it takes me a minute to spot him  but eventually his bright blue eyes lock with my green ones. I give him a sweet smile before making my way through the crowd to him.

After much maneuvering and frequent stops to accept congratulations I finally reach the spot he was and yet he is nowhere to be seen. Maybe he went to trailer  I think to myself stumbling in that direction.

Out of all of the cast me and Patrick are the only ones who had to share a trailer, shonda figured it would bring us closer together and make the chemistry more authentic for the show. I am almost to our trailer and I can barely make out his form sitting on the steps.

"Patrick!" I whisper shout waving my hands in the air like a lunatic.

I can hear his wonderful laughter as I finally approach him, "you left early" I accuse him.

"I was feeling a little too tipsy" he giggles and it is then that I notice his slightly inebriated state.

I plop down beside him and lay be head against his shoulder, "me too" I admit with a slight hiccup.

"Maybe we should go inside?" he suggests taking hold of my hand and helping me stand up.

The moment that his skin comes in contact with mine it is like and electrical current has passed through me sending shivers down my spine, I allow him to lead me into the trailer. I begin my stumble to the bed room as he locks the door and follows me.

I trip over one of my shirts that is laying on the bedroom floor and hit the floor with a soft thud. Patrick cant help but laugh as he tries to help me up. I end up knocking us both over onto the bed. We are both laughing hysterically when I realize that I am practically on top of him. I feel a blush rise to my cheeks as I begin to move off of him.

His hand gently rests on my lower back practically touching my ass and keeping me from moving. Patrick reaches up pushing a loose strand of my blonde hair out of my face. I find myself getting lost in the oceans that are his eyes and before I know it I find myself leaning closer to his lips.

His lips part slightly as soon as I cover them with mine and his hand runs softly through my tousled waves. I feel his tongue begging for entrance to my mouth and I concede moaning gently as his tongue comes into contact with mine. I am practically straddling him and he sits up bringing our pelvis's closer together. I moan loudly into his mouth tangling my hands in his dark hair as I begin gently grinding against him.

He pulls away from our heated kiss and begins his assault on my neck "Ellen" he gently moans my name between every kiss as he begins kissing my collarbones. He gently slides his fingertips under the hem of my sweater and I bring his lips back up to mine. He slowly slides me top off letting it fall to the floor. He pulls back from our kiss to appreciate my body, I watch as his eyes darken with lust and feel the bulge in his pants grow bigger.

He quickly flips us so that he is now the on in control, he positions himself between my legs gently pressing his bulge against me. "Patrick" I cant help but moan his name as his hands begin caressing my bare skin. His lips against my neck and his gentle grinding causes my back to arch and he takes this opportunity to pull back and slide by pants off.

I position myself up further on the bed and sexily beckon him closer. I watch as he strips down to nothing but his boxers and I have to stifle a moan when I see how tight his black boxers are stretched. He crawls across the bed and repositions himself between my legs, the moment that his bare skin reaches mine I can't help but let out a moan.

"God Ellen you are so sexy when you moan like that" he says in a sultry voice before he begins kissing my neck. One of his hands is clutching my waist and the other reaches around my back to unclip my bra. He discard it on the floor and begins kissing a trail from my neck down to my exposed breasts.

"Fucking perfect" he remarks stopping to stare at them before gently taking one into his mouth. I let out a surprised moan and tangle my fingers into his perfect hair. He run his tongue in a circle over my nipple causing me to loudly suck in air.

"Please Patrick" I moan wrapping my legs tighter around his waist. He kisses back up to my neck biting me gently before hotly whispering "tell me what you want me to do to you".

"I want you to fuck me Patrick" I moan pulling his lips back up to mine. He breaks off the kiss and stand up pulling my black lacy underwear off. He reaches over into the side table drawer and pulls out a condom before sliding his boxers off. I almost gasp aloud at the size of him.

He puts the condom on and crawls his way back in between my legs, he gently runs the tip along my opening to make sure I am adequately aroused. He looks at me with those sexy blue eyes "are you ready?" he asks. I bite my lower lip and raise my hips so that he can get a better angle "yes Patrick" I moan and he gently and slowly slide in to me.

I can feel myself adjusting to his enormous size as he begins slowly thrusting in and out of me. "oh god Ellen" he moans into my neck as he begins to pick up speed. "Yes Patrick" I moan my nails digging into his back.

He continues to speed up until twenty minutes later I begin to feel my walls tighten, knowing that we are both about to finish he kicks it up a notch. I dig my nails deeper into his skin and he thrust roughly into me one last time before we both climax.

After we catch our breath we both crawl under the covers and face each other nose to nose his hand gently resting on my waist.

"What does this mean?" I ask a little scared of what he will answer.

"I honestly don't know" he replies a little perplexed "I just know that his feels right" he continues gesturing to our naked bodies pressed gently together.

"But you have so much to lose" I whisper quietly and guiltily thinking about his wife.

"I'm ready to lose everything but you" he tells my bringing my lips to his.

The tears continue to pour from my eyes until I am down right sobbing into my pillow. He must have been lying because I am the one who lost everything, including him.