HEARTBROKEN

1

2 a.m., we meet again, I think to myself as I watch my alarm clock pass time. This is the third night in a row that I haven't been able to sleep. Normally I'd blame this sleep deprivation on taking a nap during the day or my stress levels due to difficult college courses, however, this time I believe the blame is on a boy named Luke.

Luke and I met two weeks ago and he's already making me lose sleep. I yearn for his attention and I hate myself for it. As content as I am with being single, I'm sure not acting like it. Lately, I've been forcing myself to stay awake at ungodly hours just so I can communicate with him via text message. Silly, right?

2:05 a.m.
Luke: Heyyy, wyd?

Me: Hey, Luke! Not much. About to fall asleep though. What's up?

Luke: Do you want to come over and watch a movie or two before you fall asleep?

Me: I don't know... It's kind of late. Maybe another time?

Seriously, May?! I think to myself as I lock my phone screen. This is the perfect opportunity to get to know him. Or, is it? Lately I've been struggling; overthinking Luke's actions towards me. Usually I can spot a fuckboy from a mile away, but with him, it's different. Even though he checks off all the boxes: texting 'hey' with multiple y's, presumably drunk texting me, inviting me over past midnight, etc--I can't seem to accept the fact that maybe he's just another boy with no good intentions. I want to believe he's sincere, but he is just caught up in the stupid "hook up culture" because that is what millennials do nowadays.

Well, that's a theory I'll have to prove tomorrow because it's getting super late and I have class at 9 a.m. Before I have the strength to unlock my phone a second time to see if he replied, I drifted off into a deep sleep.

*

"BEEP, BEEP, BEEP!" My alarm clock roared at 8:15 a.m. I shot up out of bed and shut the annoying thing off with a slam of my palm to the top of the digital clock. I groaned thinking about how early it was and laid back down in my bed, pulling my sheets over my head.

"Do you want breakfast?" I heard my best friend and roommate Bailey shout from the kitchen. Before I could give her a response I closed my eyes and smelt the burning of crisp bacon on the stove.

"Of course!" I responded. "The usual!"

Bailey does most of the cooking. What most people don't know about me is that I hate cooking. Every once in a while Bailey, my mom, or my aunt will teach me a few things here and there (depending on where I am--at college or at home). Over the years I've learned that cooking just isn't for me. I'd rather order in or eat out and this situation does not help pay the bills.

My stomach starts to grumble as I move back the grey curtains on my window to let some light in. I have lab first thing today so my outfit is basically chosen for me. I have to wear jeans, closed toed shoes, and a basic top. I ruffled through my shirt drawer and picked out a black top to go with my dark jeans and black converse. I move to the bathroom and begin brushing my long blonde hair up into a high ponytail.

"Breakfast is ready!" Bailey calls. I must have been hungrier than I thought because I grabbed three waffles and a handful of bacon. Bailey giggled and made some silly remark asking if I was preparing for hibernation in the winter. I usually don't eat much, especially during breakfast, but today was different.

"That was delicious," I say to Bailey with a mouthful of the last crispy bacon. She thanks me and tells me we should head to class now. I agree and grab my backpack from my room and my phone from my night stand.