Bitter Sweet Love. Chapter 14.

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Chapter 14. Edited.

Johnny P.O.V.

Milo had asked me to help clean the house since there was no sign of Kira coming back in time to get all the cleaning done. It was worrying the fact Kira wasn't home yet. But she wasn't a child.

''Johnny'', Milo shouted hopping in the kitchen doorway.

''Goodman Johnny'', He said observing the cleanliness of the kitchen.

''I'm too good to you man'', I said laughing as I cleaned the dishes.

''I owe you one'', Milo said laughing.

I was relying on him remembering that if he found out about me and Kira. The thought of the way he reacted when he first head she was dating Cameron Paige.

Flack back

Katie came scuttling over to us in her too high heels and was slightly bouncing on the spot.

''Guess what! Guess what!'', She chirped.

I was about to guess when she exploded.

''Little Kira's dating Cameron Paige'', She said beaming at Milo.

It was then Milo sort of exploded. ''What age is he?'', He snapped.

''He is'', Katie began to say and Milo jumped in.

''He is in my Biology class! Isn't he? Ill kill him'' Milo kept on ranting and raving about Cameron and then turned to me and said ''Thank god you have better taste'', He said after he calmed down a little and after Katie had given him a lecture on how Kira was becoming a young woman.

It was actually quite comical.

Flashback over

''Katie's coming over tonight too'', He said rubbing his hands together excited.

''Dude are you a sex maniac or something?'', I asked laughing.

''No. Well I don't think I am anyway. Just because you don't be a ''needy'' as me!'', He said laughing at his own joke.

''Yea'', I said forcing a laugh.

''Why won't you date Pixie, she dying for a piece of you'', He said actually quite serious.

''Pixie is not my type'', I said returning the serious tone.

''What is your type?'', He laughed.

Kira a thought and I smiled to myself. ''I don't have one'', I said laughing.

''I was guessing that'', Milo laughed.

Actually when I think of it, it was a strange when Milo didn't laugh or I didn't return the laugh. ''Where is Kira?'', Milo asked randomly.

''Gone out to Cameron'', I said with sadness slightly coloring my tone.

''I never liked that kid'', Milo said. ''He is strange. It's like he is constantly hiding something'', Milo said and I totally agreed but stayed quite letting Milo go on a rant. ''I really hope he doesn't come tonight. I can't stand his face, well what you can see of it behind that hair', Milo said in a bitchy voice.

I just laughed. ''What's funny?'', Milo asked.

''Nothing, it's just that you so bitchy'', I laughed.

''Worse than Katie probably'', Milo said laughing at himself.

''Well that's going a bit far'', I said laughing.

''Yea I suppose Katie is a bitch'', Milo said.

''Dude!'', I said laughing.

''OK, OK. IL stop'', He said sighing.

I was nearly done washing the dishes and I now had the hands of an 80 year old old man.

''IL see you later'', Milo said from the hallway.

''I'm going out to stock up on beer and stuff'', He said.

''Want any smokes?'', He asked I nodded in response

''OK'', He said shutting the front door behind him.

I was dreading next week when Kira's parents would be back and I would have to go back home. I was starting to love being here. I hated that I loved Kira so much; I knew she could never love me like I love her. I loved her in different ways, I loved her like a sister, a best friend and now a lover. I always feared she would not like me back, things should never go this right. I was distracted and split water on my sleeve. I pulled it up to stop them getting anymore wet. Red scabs and pink scar stared up at me. Marks of hurt, sadness, and marks that showed how I felt inside. Questions swirled around me head as I stared down at my left arm. I had the burning urge to cut myself again. I didn't want to for Kira, but pain from times gone past haunted me still and left me with this aching urge to hurt myself. I take away painful memories. I let them bleed out. I wash them out.

I did not even notice that I had pulled a knife out of the skin and was wielding it in my right hand. The man inside had taken over as I put the blade to my arm. Higher this time, wanting to hide it as much as possible. I stuck it in a cringed. I slid the knife along and revealed as perfect line. The pain was beauty. The pain felt good. Not happy, I was not happy. This was a darker side to me.

A dark side covered up by my preppy appearance. The blood poured gently from my cut. I turned on the cold tap and ran the water over it until the bleeding slowed. I patted it gently and pulled down my sleeve. I then washed off the knife and dried it. A sense of relief washed over me as bad memories were momentarily gone and replaced by the pain in my arm. I stopped washing the dishes and went to the sitting room. I sat in Kira's chair and embraced the silence, the lack of thoughts I was having and reveled in it.

The pain pounding on my arm forced me to smile. I rested my arms on the sides of the chair and let me head fall back. Peace.

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