Warning: spoilers (duh)
This was on one of my chapters but now it's going to live here because I feel it deserves its own section.
Yes, I made a diss track/roast about my phanfiction, I'm aware it makes me look like like a loser but I write phanfic so I don't know what people were expecting ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Here we go:
I hear you've got a writers block, so what do you do?
You write a diss track for a phanfic, that's a real good move.
Can I just say: congrats - you're original for once,
Never thought I'd see the day, let's hear the readers response.
"Over twenty chapters in, and they're still not canon?"
"Tbh, Dan's surprise feelings are kinda random."
You're dragging things on, this story's old news,
Losing readers even faster than Sam Pepper lost his views.
danisnotonfire - course his power relates to flames,
Threw in other elements for good measure,
not for some reason like you claim.
Phil - his power makes no sense, only uses half of it,
Always writing that's it there, but never put into practise.
There's another fourteen characters - everyone forgets,
Made a section at the back for y'all to recollect.
Maybe that's a sign that it's time for you to stop,
All these minor characters present in one part of the plot.
It's narrated in third person, but has different points of view,
PJ's there once - why? I don't have a clue.
You had a vague plan at the start, now it's all ad-lib,
Rolling with it as it's written, "that'll work"(I think)
Make a crazy plot twist when you're out of inspiration,
That's why there's a murder cult, dark themes are your fixation.
The story has no fluff, it's mostly drama and angst,
Probably won't be there at all - and smut? No chance.
You have internet friends reading your book,
Anyone irl finds this - well, I wish you luck.
Your life would be over, before it even began,
All because of two guys named Phil and Dan.
Quick A/N: sorry for saying their names in that order,
"Speaking of which - could you make yours a little shorter?"
You have a plan for the end, and a sequel too,
But no one would want to read more work by you.
Your writing is shit, just like this track.
And you're typing this out because you can't rap.
342 words of pure, mediocre-standard diss. You're welcome.
YOU ARE READING
lethal //phan
Fanfiction('LETHAL' SERIES PART I) Of course, having the ability to change and move objects using nothing more than brain power has its perks, but being sent to a special school isolated from all other humans is definitely not one of them in Phil Lester's min...
