[1] Jocelyn

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Where were you earlier?

You ask Jake, who’s sitting on the edge of your bed.

His knuckles are tainted red,

Bruised,

And tattered.

I had to talk to some poor kid,

He doesn’t meet your eyes,

And you know he beat another kid up.

He knew how much I hated that,

But he had anger issues.

There’s something you want to tell him,

But you don’t let it leave your lips just yet.

You’re scared.

It could ruin everything.

You’re worried.

It could ruin everything.

You’re terrified.

It could ruin everything!

What’s wrong?

You tell him nothing,

And that you have to leave.

He doesn’t ask anymore,

And once he’s gone,

You pick up the phone.

Hello?

His voice soothes you.

I tell him to meet me at a park near your house.

He agrees.

You leave,

Upset,

Anxious,

And scared.

Sitting on a swing,

You contemplate how this could have happened.

How could something so special,

Ruin so much?

Hi,

His voice cuts you from your thoughts.

His clothes are dirty,

Unlike the pristine one’s you wear.

His brown hair isn’t brushed,

Unlike your perfect blonde curls.

He sits on the swing next to you,

And for a while, you sit in silence.

What happened?

You finally ask, noticing his black eye,

Red cheek,

And raspy breathing.

He shakes his head,

Not telling,

Not revealing,

Hiding.

You reach out to touch his shoulder,

To comfort him.

But he moves away.

Look,

He mumbles,

Not meeting your eyes like Jake had.

I know were just friends.

But we can’t be anymore.

You feel like your five years old again,

When not being friends made you cry.

Who did this at sixteen?

You ask why,

And a tear leaves your eye.

You thought he was the only one you could talk to,

The only one you could trust.

I can’t tell you.

You know not to push him.

He never would reveal too much about his life to you.

And maybe that’s why you liked him so much.

What’s wrong?

He notices your crying,

But it’s not because you have feelings for him;

You don’t.

It’s because you need to tell him,

Before I told Jake.

Can I tell you something?

Your voice is a desperate whisper,

And you almost regret it.

You couldn’t be desperate.

But Nathan didn’t know that.

Sure,

He meets your eyes,

His match the worry in yours.

I’m pregnant.

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