Chapter Thirty Six

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TWO MONTHS AFTER MATING MOON ENDED

My stomach turns and I heave into the wastebasket sitting by my bed. Not much accompanies the stomach acid in the bin, for most foods leave me nauseated to the point of puking. I use a nearby napkin to wipe my mouth of any thing that didn't make it into the garbage. My eyes then drift to the clock on the nightstand: 4:56 am. My hands habitually stretch out on the other side of the mattress for the feeling of Mateo's body, but there is only a slight warmth to the sheet.

These days Mateo spends more time with the pack than with me. He wakes up at ungodly hours to start training, and doesn't return until the sun has dipped well below the horizon. I'm lucky to see him at lunch time, but I'm lucky if I'm alone at all.

Alpha Boomer has given explicit instructions that I'm not allowed to leave my room without a guard. The kicker is that nearly all the guards are training with my mate during all hours of daylight. I made the mistake of mentioning this to him, so his solution was to then let Luca be my personal body guard. His looming presence makes it almost impossible to do my work without any mishaps.

When I'm not in my room or in the clinic, I'm in the small, windowless office where I'm forced to do Luna duties. I was originally afraid that the gamma's mate would resent me for taking over her job, but know I know I relieved her of hours of boredom. I have to input hundreds of information about pack members into a computer. The Lunas of the past had taken notes of every member of the pack's mate related information. From who their mate is and their ranking, their home pack, when the mating moon came into effect, how many pups birthed, when the mating ceremony was completed, to more obscure things such as their parent's rank, what moon phase they were born under, and how long it took for a child to be conceived. All of this information was meticulously hand written in journals upon journals.

I'm given the task to transfer nearly a century's worth of information onto the computer, along with up keeping the current pack data. This duty seems endless and I'm tempted to ask Boomer for a few pack members to assist in helping me. Only I know better. He'll ask for something seemingly small in return; only later finding out that the terms of that favor he asked go much deeper than originally thought.

I feel isolated from the pack. I know that it's a pack known for murder, cruelty, and primal wolves, something I experienced for myself, but the only other person I talk to outside of Mateo's twisted family is the healer, Ava. I long for the gossip of females, the rambunctious children always underfoot, and I even miss the silent omegas who make faces when you turn your back.

The only good thing about being pregnant in Boomer's pack is the privileges I get. I'm allowed to sleep in until noon and then exercise until two. Any food I crave, which isn't much these days, is brought to me within the hour. This perk has my body turning curvier again, like it was the first time I came here. Mateo hasn't mentioned anything about my weight gain, but ten pounds isn't something to fuss over.

I find it hard to fall asleep after waking up from morning sickness, in this case very early morning sickness. I bet no body is up right now, my subconscious tells me. That thought alone gets me out of bed and into the bathroom in a flash. I quickly brush my teeth and pull on some socks, shoes, and a jacket.

My hand quivers at the doorknob. I'm afraid if I touch it I'll get shocked with electricity, or a silent alarm will go off. But when I touch the metal it's as cool as the air around me. Despite the fact I know that the door doesn't creak, I still open it with care and pause every few seconds to hear if anyone has woken up. Once I slip out the door I'm faced with a new set of problems: I have to sneak past all the high ranked wolves' rooms.

I'm grateful for the excellent condition Boomer keeps the house in. Not one floorboard is squeaky, and the hinges to all doors are kept regularly oiled. My feet pad across the floor, I'm not exactly sure where I'm going, I'm just glad my shadow isn't with me.

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