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So I decided to give it a twist. You will know what I mean when you read the chapter. It has something to do with Jasper before you don't know what I mean. But don't worry. Everything can break. I also wrote this on my phone so I'm sorry for all the mistakes.


'Mom, please don't let me do this,' I beg.
'You need to do this Emily. You know what to do when you get caught. You have to tell them you did it because you wanted to trow a party so you needed alcohol. If I find out you told them you needed to do this because of me, then I will make sure they float you immediately,' my mom says while she holds my shoulders.
'Mom I don't want to do this! I will get floated because of you. Do you really want that?' I ask with tears in my eyes.
My mom's eyes turn into black. I can see she's not happy with what I just said. Suddenly I have a burning feeling on my cheek. I let out a gasp and press my hand on my cheek. My own mom just slapped me!
'You're gonna do this. I don't care if you don't want this. You're seventeen so you will have a few months before they will float you.'
I don't want to but I nod my head.
'Good girl,' she says.
She presses a kiss on my forehead and I immediately want to push her away, but I don't because I know she will slap me again if I do that. I need to steal alcohol because my goddammit own mother wants to drink it every second of the day. If I get caught, then I can kiss my ass goodbye. I will never see Clarke again. I don't want to do this.
My mom pushes me out the door and she closes it behind me.
Here I go. Doing something I don't want to do. I walk over to the medical department and make sure no one sees me. I peak around the corner and see that no one is there. I'm lucky I guess. I run as fast as I can inside and look around for some alcohol. When I found a bottle I grab it and smell what's inside. Yeah, it' definately alchohol. I try to run away but I bump into someone. I look up and meet the face of Marcus Kane. Shit. I ran to the door and I hear Kane screaming for guards. No no no! No please don't catch me. Please don't! I run as fast as I can back home but someone grabs my arm and I immediately stop. I turn around and face a guard. There are tears in my face. No. Why me?
'What's you're name?' she asks.
I keep my mouth shut. My mom didn't tell me to give my name.
'What's you're name?' she says more powerful.
'Emily Shields,' I say really scared.
'You're under arrest for trying to steal alcohol,' the guard says.
No, no this can't happen.
I turn around and see Clarke running towards me. The guards stop her but she's trying to get to me.
'No, Emily! Let me go! That's my best friend you're taking,' she screams.
Emily!!! No don't!

'Emily? Hey wake up!'
I gasp for ear and my eyes shot open. I look scared around me.
'Hey hey, you're okay. You're okay, you're save.'
I look in front of me and I meet Bellamy's eyes. He looks really worried. I see Charlotte behind him looking at me with wide open eyes.
'Hey, you're okay. You just had a nightmare,' Bellamy says.
I take a deep breath and I close my eyes.
'It's like what I said to Charlotte. Slay you're-'
'Don't even start about that Bellamy. I can take care of myself. I don't need you're support with my nightmares. They're mine and only I can get rid of them, okay?' I cut him off.
Slay you're demons. There are no demons in my nightmares. Okay, maybe my mother but I'm not scared of her anymore. I still want my revenge.
'Can you take my wristband off?' I ask Bellamy.
He looks shocked. I know I said to him that I wasn't going to take it off but I changed my mind. The only thing I care about right now is the pain I want my mother to feel.
'Why do you want you're wristband off?' Bellamy asks curious.
'That's none of you're bussines. Just take the damn thing off.'
He pulls out a knife. How many knifes does he have?! He looks at me.
'This can sting sometimes,' he says.
'I don't care.'


Bellamy finally managed to get my wristband off without cutting me open. He throws the wristband in a corner and looks around.
'Where is Charlotte?' he asks with worry in his voice.
I look around for Charlotte but I can't find her. I stand up and walk to the entrance of the cave. I get out of the cave and help Bellamy. I take a look around but there's no sign of Charlotte.
'Charlotte?!' I scream.
I walk away from Bellamy trying to find the little girl. Suddenly Bellamy grabs my wrist and pulls me back.
'Don't scream. There could be grounders here,' he says.
'I don't care. I need to know where-'
A scream cuts me off. I look with wide open eyes at Bellamy. He starts to run with my behind him. Suddenly he stops and I bump into him. I walking to the place next to him and then I see Charlotte. I run to her and I pull her into a hug.
'Never do that again. You scared the crap out of me! What if something happened to you?!' I say grateful she's alive.
She keeps quiet and stares at something behind me. I turn around and I see Bellamy sitting on his knees next to a guy. I don't know him, but he looks like he's not going to be alive any longer.
'Kil-kill me. B-Bellamy, please- kill me. I can't breath,' he says.
I walk over to the boy and sit on the other side of him. Charlotte walks over to Bellamy and hands him her knife.
'Don't be afraid,' she says with tears in her eyes.
Suddenly there's someone next to me. I look to the person next to me and see it's Clarke. She looks at Bellamy with guilt in her face and then she takes the knife.
'Charlotte, go back to camp,' Clarke says without looking at her.
'You too Emily,' Bellamy says.
'No way,' I say while I look at him.
'I'm gonna help you, all right?' Clarke says to the boy.
She starts to hum a song that I know as the best. She used to sing or hum it for me when I was upset or hurt. I start to hum with her. I grab the guys hand. Clarke sticks the knife in his neck but we don't stop humming.
I look over to Bellamy and see that he's hurt. I think the boy was a friend of him.
'I'm sorry Bellamy,' I whisper.
He looks at me and gives my a sad smile. I let the boy's hand go and stand up. Bellamy covers the boy and lifts him up.
'Let's go back to camp,' he says before he walks away with the boy in his arms.


Someone opens the gate and let us in.
I can see Octavia getting out of the drop ship. She sees the body and she frown her eyebrows. Oh please don't tell me she knew him. She walks over to us.
'Octavia, just stay there,' Bellamy says.
She ignores Bellamy and walks over to the boy.
She grabs the cloth and pulls it away a little so she can see his head. I can hear her gasp and she starts to cry.
'Atom,' she cries out.
'There's nothing I could do,' Bellamy says with guilt.
Octavia stands up and tries to walk away but Bellamy grabs her arm.
'Don't,' she says.
She pulls her arm from his grasp and walks away.


I walk into the drop ship. I see Monty sitting by Jasper and I walk over to them.
'How's Jasper doing?' I ask.
Monty jumps up and turns to face me.
'Still breathing,' he says with a sad look on his face. I walk over to him and put my hand on his shoulder.
'He's gonna be okay,' I assure Monty.
'Yeah, I'm okay.'
I know that voice. I look at Jasper and see he's awake.A smile appears on my face and I put my arms around his neck.
'I'm so happy you're awake! Tank god,' I say to him.
He puts his arms around my waist and holds me.
I pull away a little and look into his eyes with a huge smile. I press my lips against his cheek. I'm so happy he's alive.
I hear someone cough and I look at Monty.
'Sorry,' I say laughing.
I walk out of the drop ship to find Clarke and Octavia. I can't find Octavia but I do see Clarke. I walk over to my best friend with a huge smile. She looks weird at me.
'Why are you so happy?' she asks laughing.
'Because Jasper is awake.'
Before I know it she's gone. I shake my head while I laugh. I see Bellamy talking to a girl and she laughs about something he said. Really? He's not even funny. but okay, maybe he knows where Octavia is. I walk over to them and interrupt them.
'Hey dumbass, do you know where Octavia is?' I ask him.
He looks at me in shock.
'Did you just called me dumbass?'
'Yeah, but that's not the point. Where's Octavia?'
'I don't know. The last time I saw her was when we got back to camp.'
'Well if you see her, tell her Jasper's awake.'
I turn around and walk back to the drop ship.
But there's no one except Jasper.
'Where is everyone?' I ask.
I was just gone for like five minutes.
'I don't know. They took off,' Jasper responds.
I walk over to him and sit next to him.
'So, how you're doing?' I ask.
'I could be better you know,' he says laughing.
'Of course you could be better.'
I take a pause and my face falls.
'I'm sorry for what happened Jasper. I'm sorry I couldn't save you faster,' I whisper just loud enough for him to hear it. He takes my hand and squeezes it. I look into his eyes.
'Don't be sorry. It wasn't you're fault. And you saved me after all. If it weren't for you I would probably be dead.'
I look sad in his eyes. Before I know it his lips are on mine. I'm in shock. What's happening? Why is he kissing me? Without even knowing I melt into the kiss.
'Woah! You finally did it bro!'
I back away and look at the entrance of the drop ship. Monty's standing there with his thumbs up. I can't helo but laugh. I didn't know Jasper likes me. Do I even like him? I think we can give it a try if he wants. I look at Jasper and see he's looking like a tomato. I laugh and grab his hand.
He looks at me with a questioned look. I just smile at him. I think he knows enough with just a smile. He smiles back at me and I can see he's happy.


'So, you and Jasper huh,' Clarke says with a grin. I laugh and look at her.
'Yeah. I didn't know he liked me that way. I'm actually still not even sure if I like him that way but I thought, why not give it a try you know?' I say with a smile.
'I hope you've made the right choice. If anything happens you can tell me,' Clarke says.
She looks at my wrist and grabs it. She looks a little sad at it.
'Why did you take it off?'
'Look Clarke, I didn't do it because I wanted to. Well actually, I did wanted it off but I took it off because of my mom,' I whisper.
No one has to know about my mom.
'She told me that if I would tell anyone that was forced to steal that alcohol for her, that she would make sure to get me floated. She wants me dead Clarke, don't you get that? So I took the opportunity to let her think that I'm dead. I'm sorry if you feel betrayed now. Really I didn't want you to feel like that but I wanted revenge Clarke. You know how my mother was and what she made me do,' I say with tears in my eyes.
She pulls me into a hug and I rest my face on her shoulder.
'I'm sorry about you're mom Em. You're right, I know how she was and I should've thought about that. I understand that you took you're wristband off.'
She lets me go and looks into my eyes.
'You got that nightmare again, didn't you?' she asks.
Goddamn she's smart. I nod. She was the first one to know about that. Our cells were next to each other so we could talk. I was really grateful for that. I couldn't see her but I could speak to her.
She was always there for me. Just like she is now.
'You will never see you're mother again, okay? I will make sure of that. If you want that by the way.'
I nod again.
'Thank you Clarke,' I say with a little smile.
What would I do without her? I would probably be dead right now i think. I see movement behind Clarke and I focus on that. I see Bellamy walking towards his tent and he's not happy. Well I'm not gonna help him with his problems. He can take care of himself. I hope.