copyright 2017 Chris Smith All rights reserved.
"Somewhere...I lost myself."
Another day above ground. Another fight on the field. Another battle for survival. Another sunrise without answers. But maybe by the time sunset came we'd find some.
It was an early day. We had to get our asses in gear if we were going to make it to the Doc's. They scheduled us in their largest exam room and didn't schedule a lot of other patients while we were there. We took up a lot of time since there were three of us and Mom was very sick.
We dressed Mom and loaded her into the car with Dad's help. Mom laid down on the tiny back seat and used Dad's backpack to prop her head up. It was the most comfortable we could make her in the old VW Bug.
He bought the car when he came home from Vietnam. It was the same car he courted Mom in. On their first date he took her to the beach for a picnic dinner. He barbecued a chicken on some sticks over an open fire. Mom was completely impressed. Dad had major swag.
It was the same car he proposed to her in, parked on a little local street by the beach.
"So, what do you think about marriage?" Dad asked on that day so many moons ago.
"What do you think?" Mom responded.
"I asked you first," he said.
"I asked you second," Mom responded.
She wasn't going to make it easy for him. I imagined him, stammering, trying to find a way to tell her. Trying to spill his heart out and put everything on the line. He finally did and she said "Yes". It would be the start of a great many adventures. Theirs was an epic love story that had stretched across the miles and years in ways that would require too many books to tell it all.
Times had changed. Now we were driving her to Doctor appointments. Dad spent a lot of his time in the car running errands. They weren't any more beach trips.
It was the same routine every time we arrived at the Doc's. I would wait outside in the car while Dad went inside to find out if they were ready for us. Then Dad would come back outside with the wheelchair. Dad would help lift Mom out of the back seat into the wheelchair that I would steady for him, and we'd all head back inside.
She was so frail these days. It was hard to look at her. I had to push it out of my mind, the why of it. I had to push all the feelings so deep. I had to bury them. I couldn't do all this if I had to always be aware of it. It would kill me. It was killing me. Not in the flesh. But in the soul. In the places I had no name for with feelings I couldn't put into words.
Trips to the Doc's were a chore. Dad and I had to be attentive and always aware of Mom.
Did Mom need anything?
Was Mom okay?
We wheeled Mom into the exam room and unloaded her onto the chiropractic exam table. Then the Doc walked in, holding all our charts.
"Are you still doing the massages?" the Doc asked.
"Yes, but we haven't been able to get anything to loosen up," Dad said.
The Doc went through the Applied Kinesiology testing on Mom, using Dad as the surrogate, while I took notes. He picked up viral in her large intestine.
"Keep hitting her hemorrhoid point," the Doc said looking at me.
"Okay," I said.
He pulled out his stethoscope and listened to her gut again.
"She's showing improvement," the Doc said.
"Really?" I asked.
The Doc looked at me.
"Yes, she is. But we need to get things moving a little faster. Hold on," the Doc said.
The Doc walked out of the room and we waited. It wasn't a good sign when he walked out of the room. It meant he was bringing something else into the mix which could mean trouble for the people taking it. Well, it helped heal but it wasn't always fun to go through.
The Doc walked back in the room with a small bottle. It was a new nutritional supplement we'd never taken before, Aloe 225.
"So tonight, give her six," the Doc said.
"Six?" I asked.
Six pills were a lot of pills to give at once. Especially something as strong as aloe vera.
"Yep. Six," the Doc said.
"Okay," I said.
I knew a little about aloe vera and it's healing properties from a seminar years ago. It was given by a nutritional supplement company who had brought in a man dubbed the name "Mr. Aloe". I had sat in the seat, listening to his lecture, in total amazement of the things he'd put to the test with his aloe.
When we all finished with our exams, Dad went up front to the receptionist desk to settle up and get any nutritional supplements we needed.
The Doc pulled me aside while Dad was out of the room. Something was up. Whenever he pulled me aside, it meant whatever he had to tell, was only for me. And he was telling me in part to my honorary title of "Junior Doc".
"Don't tell your Dad this but this may get things moving in a big way," the Doc said with a wink.
"Uh, okay," I replied.
I laughed! Dad was going to be in for a surprise. It was my guess he'd have his hands full, literally.
Me to Bro: The Doc said Mom has a viral infection. Doc said her gut sounds good. Upping her supplements to get things moving. He said she's in an emotional hole that she may not be able or want to dig herself out of.
Juice Day 80
4 leaves collard greens
2 ½ apples
1 tablespoon ginger root
2 leaves red leaf lettuce
4 leaves napa cabbage
2 ½ carrots
2 stalks celery
½ cup fresh pineapple
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A HARD RUN INTO HELL Book 4 (EDITING) is the juice worth the squeeze seriesNon-Fiction
I was standing in Hell, burning. I looked over to see my Dad, standing right next to me. He was burning too. We had brought my Mom home from the hospital and care facility, after being diagnosed with Stage 3 cancer and decided not to do chemo, ag...