Warning, there are some hurt thoughts so please don't take it too seriously.
Hurt. Pain. Lost. Heartbroken. That's all I felt as I laid next to a tree in a fetal position. I didn't care if I was dirty or anything. I clutched my heart as I let my tears fall. I stayed here for who knows how long. The others would probably come looking for me sooner or later. But I needed to stay here a little longer.
I guess I now know how Bella felt when Edward left her. The emptiness and pain in my shattered heart grew. The image of Jacob kissing Bella replayed over and over again. I wasn't mad at Bella because I knew she would never kiss Jacob especially when she just got Edward back. And I wasn't as much mad at Jacob either. Of course it was his move to kiss Bella but I was mostly upset at myself...for letting this go on so fast and any longer...
I knew I should've avoided him, at least until he got over Bella. And I was foolish enough to believe that he was already over her...but he wasn't. That's why he's been so distant. He was working up the chance to tell Bella he loves her. And I was just the imprint...forced to be with him...not fully by love but by the force of the imprint love. I was never first to him. I'm always second when it came to Bella. I mean this whole drama has been evolved around her. If I just stood back and let things slide then I wouldn't be in this much pain.
The image of them kissing kept replaying in my head over and over again. And the way he looked after also killed me.
I stayed here for another few minutes until I composed myself enough to stand up. I had no tears left, though, they'd probably refill themselves again later. I checked my phone in case any of my family members called me but all there were was missed calls and texts from Jacob and the other guys. Though it's probably Jacob just using their phones to see if I'd pick up.
I placed my phone back in my bag. I should be heading back home. All I want to do is just lay in bed and cry. I actually wouldn't mind if a newborn or Victoria came to finish me off. That's how much I don't want to be here right now.
I am a horrible person. How could I be so stupid and careless! I really wanted to talk to Bella about how I'm deciding to finally move on from her and because Avalei means so much to me now, but when she mentioned graduation, all I saw was her with red eyes. I knew she was going to turn after graduation so I needed to confess everything to her. But what I didn't expect myself to do was end up kissing her!
What makes everything much more worse is that Avalei saw the whole thing...okay maybe she only saw the kiss but she still saw me kissing someone!
The hurt and pain I saw on Avalei killed me. I can never get her face out of my head.
I really didn't know what was happening until Avalei gasped and Bella pushed me away. It was as if the old me before I met Avalei just took over. One minute Bella and I were talking about the ponds and the party, then next minute I was kissing Bella and we saw Avalei running away, crying. My intentions were to just tell Bella I was happy now with Avalei but I didn't realize what I've done until after everything, and it was so not worth seeing Avalei hurt.
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Avalei Cullen (A Twilight Saga Fanfic)Fanfiction
What happens when a lost little girl wanders through a forest, getting chased by a sadistic vampire who killed her family just minutes before? She soon stumbles upon a few individuals that are extremely pale, beautiful, and have golden eyes who scar...