Violet (Edited)

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Water is simply hydrogen and oxygen.

Air is mostly nitrogen and oxygen.

I am seventy percent water, seventy percent hydrogen and oxygen.

And yet. Yet I am here, the river is adding those thirty percent as my lungs fill with the liquid, and I need air.

I need it so much that my whole body aches.

So much that I press my lips together, holding my breath.

So much that I try to unfasten my seatbelt, watch Noemi as she tries to open the door, lean over Scott to try for myself.

So much that, as it doesn't work, I can feel panic spreading through my veins.

I. need. air.


I turn around and smile at Noemi who's standing behind me. A faint blush is on her cheeks, and I can't help but chuckle a little.

Yet there's another feeling in my chest: happiness because I exactly know what she is going to say, and I like it.

I liked the first date, I liked the kiss, and I like her.

"Yeah?" I answer, looking her in the eye.

She clears her throat, her gaze darts to the ground before she looks at me again. The expression on her face is nervousness. It's adorable.

"Will you... go on a second date... with me?" she finally stutters, and as soon as she words flip off her tongue, her cheeks turn one shade darker.

My smile breaks into a cheeky, wide grin.

"Yes, Noemi, I will gladly go on a second date with you," I respond.

Her eyes widen, and then she smiles, too - a big, happy smile. The thought I can make her this happy makes my heart pound.

"Great," she says.

I've never heard someone say that simple word in a cuter way than this one.

My eyelashes flutter.

A world full of secrets opens up to me: a blurry image of thousands of faces, shadows in the water; as if it's a story book that I miserably fail to read. Yet I know it wants to tell me something - I know it, simply because this is happening.

I believe everything happens for a reason. So there must be one for all this, too, and it's right here for me to see, but I'm blind. Blind, and seeking, and I will continue until I find whatever it is I am supposed to see.

Even if it means I will no longer live afterwards.

I've had a pretty good life already.

I have friends that help me through everything, a caring family, and my girlfriend that means the world to me.

Just as I finish that thought, I realize what is happening right there in front of my eyes as the blur clears for one second.

It's Allie. And Luke.

I don't take long until I see, see the paleness of Luke's, his closed eyelids, the lashes not even fluttering a tiny, tiny bit, see that I will never look into the green eyes of his again because he will never open them anymore.

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