The songs for this chapter are:
How to save a life- The Fray
"Christ," I hear Harry's voice, deep inside of my cloudy mind. It has to be him. "Fuck Tess, I'm so sorry. This is all my fault." Sorry for what?
"You've got that right! This is your fault, now get out of my house before I have you escorted by the police!" My mother shrieks.
"Would you give it a rest! I'm not going anywhere. Go ahead and call the police and have them show up here this late, you'll be the talk of the town and we all know you don't want that." Just stop! I want to scream at the two of them, I can't keep up with them fighting this way. My mother speaks again but it's impossible for me to hear her, the darkness is dragging me under, pulling hard, maybe that's why my head is so heavy..
"I hope you can hear me, I'm so sorry. God, I'm so sorry for all of this. I shouldn't have let you walk away in the first place. What was I thinking?"
"But you weren't even there?" I say to him. Can he hear me?
"You would be proud of me, a little, I think. I didn't kill Dan when I found him, I only kicked him in the face.. oh and I choked him a little but he's still breathing, and I almost drank tonight but I didn't. I couldn't make things even worse between us. I know you think I don't care but I do, I just don't know how to show you," Harry's voice cracks as he speaks softly. "Can you hear me?" He asks.
"Yes, what about Zayn? Did you hurt him?" I breath, the thoughts are there and I am trying my hardest to say them, I'm just not sure if my mouth is working with my mind.
"No, it's Harry. I'm Harry, not Zayn."
I know.. I think. Harry is here, not Zayn. Wait, Zayn is here too. Isn't he?
"No, Harry, did you hurt Zayn?" The darkness is tugging me in the opposite direction from Harry's voice.
My mother's voice enters the room but I can't make out a word, the only clarity I have is in Harry's voice.
"No, I'm not." He barks. "Sure, where is the room?"
A few moments later, I feel something push under my body, Harry's arm? I'm not entirely sure but I'm lifted off of the couch as the familar minty scent fills my nostrils. Why is he here and how did he find me?
Only seconds after I'm gently laid back on the bed, I'm lifted again. I don't want to move. Harry's shaky hands push a shirt over my head and I want to scream at him to stop touching me. The last thing I want is to be touched but the moment Harry's fingers brush against my skin the memory of Dan's disgusting touch is erased.
"Touch me again, please. Make it go away," I beg.
He doesn't reply.
Can he not hear me? I know deep down he can't but I was silently praying that he somehow could. His hands keep touching my head, my neck, my hair, and I try to lift my hand to his but it's too heavy.
"I love you and I'm so sorry," I hear before my head rests back on the pillow. "I want to take her home,"
No, leave me here. Please, I think to myself. I don't waste the energy to try to speak.
But don't go...
My head is heavy, so heavy and the light is shining too bright through the yellow curtains. Yellow curtains? I reopen my eyes to find the familiar yellow curtains of my old bedroom covering the windows.