Tick Tock (3)

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Chapter Three


I couldn’t wait for rehearsals the next day, so I could see

Robbie and suggest our trip to see Peter Pan.  I mean, if he agreed, we’d be, like, going on a proper date thing.  As friends, but still, the possibility of spending a day with him, alone, like, outside school made my heart sing!

Just the thought of Robbie made me grin like a maniac.  With his amazing brown hair that to most people looked plain and boring, but to me it was anything but.  And his tall, lean frame with his perfectly muscular arms and naturally slightly tanned body, with the most perfect stomach, and the most amazing eyes.  Argh, just thinking about him made my legs turn to jelly and my heart pound erratically.  The only problem was…

“Hey, babe,” said Kevin as I got in the limo.  As I sat on the seat, he placed his hands on my waist and dragged my over to his side, smashing his lips against mine in a greeting.

“Rawr,” I said once we had finished our snog-a-thon.  This was the problem.  I was kind of dating Kevin, and he was a really nice bloke; funny, kind, good looking, rich, so sweet.  He just… wasn’t Robbie, was he?

Kevin had lovely short ginger hair that he spiked up everyday.  He was quite a short bloke, which suited me perfectly, and he was amazing at basketball.  He also lived two doors down from me, which was kind of perfect, as we could spend so much time together.

Kevin was treating me to a full evening with him, spend the night at his, and get a lift to school with him before he missed Friday so he could jet off to the US to go play some b-ball with pros.

That left a boyfriend free weekend for me, where I could spend the Saturday with the boy I truly loved and wanted to go out with.

You may be wondering why I didn’t just ask Robbie out myself.  Well, truth be told, I’m pretty strict about traditions, and I’ve always dreamed of marrying the guy that doesn’t need me to ask him to start dating.  I wanted Robbie to ask me, and so that way I would know that he was serious about us, about me.

It’s not like I hadn’t hinted about my undying love for him!  I had tried so much, trying to get him to realise I was madly in love with him.  When greeting him, I’d hug him for a fraction of a second longer than I’d hugged Jamie for.  I’d smile at him a fraction of a bit more warmly than I had at Darren.  I’d bite my lip as I looked into his eyes.  How obvious did I have to make it?

But he was my best friend’s brother, which concerned me.  What if Robbie wouldn’t ask me out because he though Jamie wouldn’t approve.  What if Jamie didn’t approve?  I had known about this passionate love for Robbie for a year and a half now, and I couldn’t bring myself to talk about it with Jamie, incase she didn’t like it, or wanted to keep me away from Robbie.  And I couldn’t stay away from him, no how, no way.  I just couldn’t do it.

I had dated other boys, trying to get rid of this feeling for Robbie, but it wouldn’t go away.  It would leave me alone.  It haunted me everywhere I went, whenever I did something I would be thinking of Robbie and I couldn’t stop it!  Truth be told, I didn’t want to stop it.

When I woke up, I would be smiling after having a dream where I could be with Robbie, dreaming of our future, marriage, kids, just… together.  It didn’t matter what we did, as long as we were together.

When I got dressed, I would be wondering if Robbie would like what I was wearing, what he thought of what I looked like, whether he approved of my skirt, blouse, the way I styled my hair, my bag…

When I was eating, I would be wondering if Robbie liked what I was eating, if he was eating at that moment too.

When I was looking at him, I would be wondering what he was thinking, and what he felt.

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