On My Own

Hope

He took a deep breath, looking worn out, and at which point Kota jumped in. "Sweetie.. We .. we didn't know you were pregnant. I think knowing that would have changed what we did, not that I'm trying to excuse what we did but. We're just all so sorry."

Around the room they nodded, and added to the apology. By the end of their little speech, it was all I could do to keep from crying. I pressed my cheek to the top of Hope's head and sucked in a deep breath.

"Does anyone want to leave?"

They all looked back at me blankly. I sighed and expanded on my question.

"I mean. If anyone is looking for an out, here it is. I'm in this until I die, and I don't want to have Hope grow up in a house where someone who is supposed to be a parent, doesn't want her. So if you're not in 100 percent, walk away now. No one will judge you, or hate you, and you can still be a part of her life and mine if you want, but you can't walk in and out of my life like you did nine months ago."

The room was quiet enough to hear the little drips in the IV connected to my arm. No one spoke, some of them didn't look like they were breathing. It was Victor who spoke up on behalf of them all.

"We'll stay. If you'll have us."

I met the eyes of each of them and nodded.

"It's not going to be perfect, and it won't go back to how it was overnight- in fact, I'm not even the same girl. So if you want to leave after you get to know me, I won't be mad."

Kota looked at me. "Sang. You're the same girl you've always been.. You're just not hiding behind all of the crap that's happened to you anymore. Forgetting your past, however briefly, gave you the opportunity to find yourself, and now that you have, there's no way you're going to lose yourself. We love you."

I felt like I should say something profound, but I couldn't.

"I love you all too."

The words were simple. Automatic. True. I felt my chest tighten as my eyes threatened to betray me and cry. I did love them, I didn't think I'd ever stop loving them.

There was peace that washed over the room with the admission of still loving them all. They relaxed, and so did I.

"Does anyone want to hold her?"

Eight hands shot up in the air. I looked at Sean curiously and he looked down at the ground in a semi guilty fashion.

"I already got to hold her.. I snuck into the nursery..."

I shook my head at him with a small smile. "Of course you did."

He winked, and as Hope got passed around the room, I watched as each of the men in her life acted as if she were their own. I didn't need to tell them who her DNA would match up to. It didn't matter, because she didn't belong to any one of us, she was ours, and she was loved.

We wouldn't be okay for a long time; but for now, we were happy, and safe.

North's strong voice broke me out of my thoughts as he looked around at us with a panicked expression. Hope had woken up when she'd been passed to him, and she was squirming around happily.

"Uh. Guys?"

Luke laughed, "look, big bad North is being taken down by a little girl."

North glared at him and held Hope in a very technical swaddle. It looked stiff and as if he'd practiced making sure his arms were positioned just so, but she wasn't having any of that as she tried to squirm around, ruining his perfect cradle.

"Don't fucking laugh, help."

"North," Owen reprimanded, "That's not what her first word is going to be.. Here.. hand her to me."

As North passed Hope over to Owen, he had pink dusted cheeks. His eyes glanced over to mine and he apologized with a shrug of his shoulders. I grinned in return.

Owen cleared his throat while ensuring that Hope didn't squirm her way out of his muscled arms.

"Excuse me gentlemen, does anyone know how to change a diaper?"

Kota perked up, "I do! I used to help take care of Jessica, I'm sure I remember how to.." He started, but faltered as Hope was passed over to him. He looked up at me with scared green eyes and I understood instantly.

"Kota, you are in no way being held responsible for Edmunds actions. We're starting fresh today."

He gave me an appreciative smile and laid Hope in the little rolling hospital crib. The other's crowded around him as he changed her diaper, trying to learn so that they could do it next time.

I fell asleep to the sound of my family bickering over who could do it faster, and if they should have some sort of timed race.

The End 

I am 400% sure there will be an epilogue, so watch for that! I'm not sure about a sequel... Thanks for the comments, votes, love, demands, and overall patience!!! -FallonMagenAnne