Crash, Bang, Boom

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Waking up the morning after Trevor left was hard. I missed him so much and he’s only been gone twelve hours so far. I didn’t want to get out of bed but I had a little man depending on me. Thinking of Cody brightened my mood and gave me the push I needed to get up and get moving. Kicking off the sheets, I sat up then immediately laid back down.

Major dizziness. It was a little strange because I always got out of bed like that every morning and I never felt dizzy like this. Must be the lack of sleep due to missing Trevor’s body next to mine. Trying again, slowly this time, I got up and out of bed. Testing out my legs, I felt fine, so it must have just been a freak moment.

I brushed my teeth and washed my face, then slipped into some comfortable shorts and a cute halter top. Cody and I were going to lounge around the house today so there was no need to dress up. I grabbed my favorite body spray from Bath & Body Works and was about to spray it when the smell made me nauseous. Dropping it, I ran to the bathroom just in time to spew in the toilet, but being that my stomach was empty, all that came out was saliva and what tasted like stomach acid. 

Brushing my teeth for the second time, I took a moment to breathe. This day wasn’t starting out so well. First I have to wake up Trevor-less and now I’m coming down with something. I seriously had the worst luck.

Sucking it up, I wiped my face and headed downstairs for my day with Cody. Lucky for me he was satisfied with some cereal for breakfast so I wouldn’t risk spewing over a hot stove. I tried not to sit too close to him and risk having him catch what I had.

As the day went on, I was feeling much better. Maybe it was just a slight bug, nothing more. Deciding to test my theory, Cody and I went outside to sit on the dock by the lake. The sun worked wonders and I felt much better.

As we were sitting, Cody got a curious look on his face causing me to panic. “Please don’t ask me a question I’ll have to make up an answer to.” I thought to myself. He then asked, “Do you think uncle Trevor would want to be my daddy?”

I was blown away, that was the last thing I expected him to say. Lucky for me, I already knew the answer to that question, “I think he already thinks of you as his little boy, but it wouldn’t hurt to ask him when he gets home.”

He smiled at me brightly and I couldn’t help but return it. “Really? Yipee!” He shouted, raising his fist in the air. Then he got serious again.

“What is it, bud?” I asked.

“Well, if uncle says yes, will you be my mommy?”

I was stunned speechless. I knew he liked me, but I didn’t realize how much. I felt my heart expand with love for this little guy, and I was honored that he wanted me to be his mom. The waterworks started then.

“Why are you crying? Did I do something bad?”

I felt badly for making him think that, so I grabbed him up into a bear hug, trying not to squeeze the breath out of him and said, “No, honey. You made me so happy.” I set him back down beside me, “We have to talk about this with uncle Trevor first, but I would love to be your mommy.” I smiled wiping the tears from my eyes.

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