I jolted awake from my sleep, more scared I'd ever been. I had this awful dream that Kevin called me and told me he wasn't coming back.
What if that ends up coming true?
Nah, Bethany don't think of things like that.
I can't really help it. I love Kevin and he's not here with me. I can't look out my window and see him and he can't come over and I can't reach him or touch him or kiss him.
He says he's always here but he's not.
"Oh my god.." I mumbled, covering my face and laying back down on my pillow.
Let's face it, he's not texting me as often as he should be. It's been a week and he's called me 3 times, not every night. I'm always seeing new covers on YouTube and snapchat stories of him having fun with his fans, or digaz.
What if he comes back and hardly remembers me?
I should really stop thinking like this.
I got up out of bed and got dressed.
I put on a white tank top, jean shorts, and put on a tan cardigan. I put my hair in a messy bun.
I slid on my black and white adidas slippers and walked out of the house and went Dunkin.
I order my usual coffee coolatta and sit down at a table.
I sipped it quietly, not knowing what to think about, until someone sat in front of me. I looked up at them.
"I hope you don't mind," he said. "There's no other seats available." He blushed.
He's type cute, but he's no Kevin Alston. He had light brown hair and hazel eyes sorta like Kevin but everything else was different.
"Nah I don't mind," I quietly said. I feel really awko taco.
Really Kevin? Why are making me feel this way. I used to be a confident girl with and even more confident boyfriend but now he's away and not calling and I'm having a hard time talking to a guy.
"My name is Jordan." He said, "In case you were wondering."
I nodded my head. "Bethany."
"What?" He asked.
"My names Bethany." I repeated.
"That's a nice name. Why are you here alone if you don't mind me asking?" He drank his coffee.
"My boyfriend's outta town. Well I mean I can't even tell if we still dating. I hope we are."
"Well if you're ever not dating, you can give me a call because I think you're really beautiful and I want to get to know you better, Bethany." He smiled.
I giggled at him. My first real smile ina while. Maybe I'll call him if Kevin doesn't call me soon...
What am I thinking?
"Thanks for the talk Jordan." I smiled. "But I actually gotta go." I stood up and began walking away but he pulled me back.
"Wait, I never got your number." He said.
"Figure it out." I winked and walked away laughing.
I could see his confused face through the window outside and I couldn't help but laugh. He seems nice.
That night I called Kevin 3 times and all 3 were denied. What is going on? He better not be cheating on me, I swear.
I denied Bethany's third call. I don't think she understands my stress. Probably because I won't fucking call her or text her!
I'm the worst boyfriend ever.
I love Bethany so much, but I can't do this. I feel like I'm putting the digaz before her, but I sorta got to.
I'm ina different state for the digaz and I can't keep constantly be calling Bethany and texting her, despite the fact that I wanna.
The first day of being here I was already having doubts of being away from each other and still dating.
Ion know what to do. Every night I think of her and I ain't happy to see the digaz because being away from her is all that's on my mind and it's getting me tight and driving me crazy.
Should I break up with her?
Then we can get back together when I get home...
Nah. I just won't call or text her. Maybe she'll assume we over?
Maybe it'll help me get her off my mind...
Kevin, you reallll stupid for that 🤔😭
For anyone who hasn't read my story before this, called 'The Love Project', go show some love pls 🙏🏼. Ima start updating that book soon. I ran out of ideas 😭
Much love babes🙏🏼