chapter fifteen

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I helped him into my dorm and luckily Alex was still awake.

"I didn't know if you would come so quick if I said Harry was here. That's why I only asked you to come home." She said, helping me to get Harry over to my bed.

He was clearly drunk off his ass, so it was a wonder he even managed to get here and find the right dorm number.

"Okay, tell me what you've done." I said once he had his back against the wall. "Can you go get some water?" I asked Alex, who nodded and disappeared.

"Do you think you can ask your roommate to leave?" He mumbled, rubbing his eyes a little.

"Where would she go?" I asked, slightly frustrated.

"Sam, it's fine." Alex said, coming up from behind with a glass of water. "I assumed you would bring him in, so I asked Grace if I could sleep at their place tonight."

Two minutes later, Harry and I were alone in the dorm. I dragged the nearest chair towards myself and sat down, facing my wasted friend.

"I invited Charlie over, because I've realised what a jerk I've been the last couple of weeks. I also texted you, but I heard you were with Jesse. Anyway. So, Niall got us drunk."

No surprise

"And then he brought some girls over, telling me I needed to relax or something. But the sudden female company didn't do anything for me, if you know what I mean... And I thought that maybe it was because I wasn't drunk enough, so I drank more."

"Oh, Harry..." I sighed.

"Charlie tried to stop me after a while. He told me that it was enough for one night and I snapped at him. I fucking snapped at my best friend, Sam."

He took another sip of the water before continuing.

"I yelled at him, poor Charlie didn't deserve that. He was just looking after me, like always. But I told him to leave and then asked for another beer. The guys started smoking indoors, and Ted offered me something that wasn't a regular cigarette. Niall told me to just drink the beer and not smoke anything, so I took his advice. There were a girl in my lap and she was trying to kiss me, several times. But the one I wanted to kiss wasn't there. He had left the room."

He

"And I never thought I would be attracted to a guy. Never in a million years. I've always been into girls, but living in the frat has changed me. Now I'm writing songs with him and we hang out all the time. I can't stop thinking about him, Sam, and he makes me crazy. The thing is that I don't feel attracted to anyone else but him. I've never even considered myself being the slightest gay. And I know he's not gay. He has Kayla for God's sake."

Louis. He's talking about Louis.

"So the alcohol took over. I pushed the girl off of me and left the room. Stumbled around for a while until I found him in the kitchen. He made fun of me for not being able to walk straight and... and I kissed him."

I got up from the chair and sat down upon the bed, patting Harry's shoulder.

"The worst part is that I didn't get any reaction whatsoever. He didn't push me away, he didn't kiss back, and damn, he didn't even say a word afterwards. He just stared at me like I was completely insane, and maybe I am. I've never felt this way about another guy before and it's freaking me out. So I left the flat and ended up here. I didn't know who to turn to about this."

I felt honoured that he came to me, but I was speechless. And if I felt numb, just imagine how Louis must feel right now. But Harry is probably worst.

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