Chp27. "I'm getting used to you"
Dedicated to- GotMeGoodBieber because I loved how her comment asked me a serious question which I loved answering :)
It had been almost two weeks of doing the same thing day after day. Two weeks of the same routine. Two weeks of spending endless amount of time locked in the guest room. Two weeks since Austin and I had locked lips. And every single night for those two weeks, I cried myself to sleep.
I cried myself to sleep because that was the only thing I could do. I cried about how messed up my life is, my mom, my friends, school, and my father. And I think I cried most because of him; I still wasn't able to let go completely.
I cried because I'm a worthless piece of crap that falls for everything and can't fight her own battles.
I really really hated myself. I hated myself because of everything. But I mostly hated myself for being so stupid and giving in to Austin. Cause that's what he wanted, to play a game. And I sadly did give in. The sad thing is, I proved to him that I'm just like any other girl.
What's really pathetic is that half of these two weeks I've been wondering why Austin never brought our previous event up again. I thought he was going to tease me about it nonstop, torment me. But he didn't. He did just the opposite; he ignored it.
I wanted to do that, I waned to forget but every time I tried forgetting it would only backfire on me. God, I really hated myself for letting this happen. I knew this was going to happen, I knew it. Yet I went ahead anyways.
I guess I learned my lesson.
We were currently inside Austin's red range rover which I never new he had. The kid was freaking rich he probably owns two mansions somewhere else and god knows what else he owns.
Damon was riding shotgun as Stella and I sat awkwardly in the back. We were all waiting for Austin to fill the car with gas, before making our way to eat. Damon decided it would be all good for us to take some time together and bond, his words not mine.
Through these past days staying with the collins, I've learned a few things. For one, they started living by themselves right after their dad had died in a car accident. Their mother was never in the picture. And two, Stella really hates me.
I don't know what I did to cause her such hate towards me but it seemed that I must have done something terrible. She ignored me the entire time as if I were never even staying at her house, unless you count the few other times she would send me death glares. Damon on the other hand was the complete opposite, he was kind and friendly- unlike Stella. He made me feel right at home, even though it will never really be home to me.
And Austin- well he's Austin. Though he hasn't really been aggressive or an asshole to me. He sort of just... ignored me not completely ignored but in a way that he talks to me occasionally.
I don't know why he was acting like this; so distant. Maybe it was because of that kiss.
Fuck, now he thinks I'm a whore. I mess everything up.
Unfortunately I would be lying if I said it didn't kind of hurt my feelings a little bit. One thing I hated was feeling ignored. Somehow one day, out of the blue he randomly handed me some cash. He said it was to buy whatever I wanted and needed. Which I had to go out with Stella to put that money to use; I kindly invited Damon to cease the tension that was going to create only between us.
It was really awkward receiving money from Austin. But I really needed it more than anything, I need new clothes and so much other things. But if it wasn't for that I would have never even gladly taken his money. I hated taking money from people in general.
"Austin needs to hurry up already!" Damon groaned, fixing his now dyed dark brown hair; leaving the redhead look behind for his sister only. "I'm starving."
"Damon shut the hell up already, you've been saying the same thing for ten minutes straight." Stella snapped at her brother.
Damon sucked his teeth. "You're always so bitter..." he mumbled quietly.
I tried my best to contain myself from laughing due to Damon's words. It was true, Stella was always bitter but when it came to Austin it was the complete opposite. She was exclusively too kind to him. But Austin didn't want anything to do with her, he would only rudely push her away while calling the meanest names I didn't even know existed.
"We're probably not going out to eat anyways." Stella stated. "You know how Austin is, always changing his mind at the last fucking minute."
"- and not to mention how many times he refused to go when you asked him for all of us to have dinner together." She continued.
Damon turned around in his seat to the back, facing Stella and I. He looked at his sister and shook his head. "He will take us to eat."
"He won't." Stella argued back.
Damon's eyes parted from Stella and shot up to meet mine. He stared at me and softly spoke over the radio playing in the background. "He will if Mia asks him to." Damon said as a grin slowly appeared on his lips.
Stella's eyes quickly took sight of me. I sunk into my seat awkwardly as they both stared.
"It's true" Damon smirked making Stella roll her eyes. I felt a rush of blood quickly heating my cheeks, I tried covering it up.
However before Damon or Stella were able to notice I was blushing, the car door swung open as Austin stepped inside. He sighed frustrated before buckling his seatbelt. Adjusting his mirrors, Austin turned the engine to his range rover again, as it came back to life and ready to go.
It turns out Austin did stop somewhere for us to eat. As he parked I unbuckled ready to bolt. Opening the door, the cold wind quickly hit my body; causing me to shiver. I was wearing a light cardigan nothing that could over come this cold. It's usually never really that cold in the fall time around here. It almost felt like winter.
"Are you cold?" Damon asked as he gave me his concern look.
I shook my head denying. "No, I'm fine." I lied.
Damon chuckled. "No you're not. You're freezing."
Stella was walking behind us and Austin in the lead, both not paying any attention only walking.
"Here" Damon took his hands out of his pockets and prepared himself to take off his jacket.
"No- no, Damon it's okay." I assured him.
"Don't be silly Mia." He smiled. "I don't want you to catch a cold. Just take my jacket." Damon unzipped his jacket as he started sliding it off his body.
But unfortunately he was stopped by Austin in just a few seconds later. Austin whom was in the lead turned around facing both of us. I didn't know how he managed to do it but he looked as tan as ever in such cold weather.
"She said she was fine." Austin hissed looking at Damon with nothing but pure hatred.
These weeks everything felt awkward between Damon and Austin. Austin did apologize to Damon for that scene he had caused a few days back. And Damon of course forgave him right away. But that didn't help how cold things were every time Damon would try to help me or be nice to me. It wouldn't last long considering Austin would throw another harsh comment or insult leaving an awkward vibe behind.
"She's fucking freezing!!" Damon yelled catching a few of the peoples attention who were walking by us. "She's going to get sick."
Austin stopped right in his tracks and postured himself. "She doesn't need your help, Damon."
"She does in fact." Damon replied as he took his jacket completely off and handed it to me.
Austin came closer and reached his hands to my arms taking Damon's jacket away from me.
"Here." He growled handing Damon his jacket back. "I said she doesn't need your shit."
Stella caught up to us but didn't even bother paying attention since she was on her phone. Damon shook his head with an angry face expression. "Just for once Austin, will you stop being so damn stubborn."
Austin ignored Damon's comment as he took the hoodie he was currently wearing off, revealing his plain white shirt. I couldn't help but wonder if he was even cold, but he stood his pride.
Austin stood in front of me and decided to put on his hoodie on me instead. He then placed my arms through the grey hoodie and zipped it close. It felt warm and held Austin's scent. I inhaled the way it smelled; vanilla and cinnamon.I held my breath as Austin adjusted his hoodie on my body, Damon only watched amazed before frowning to himself.
"That's what this was about?" Damon shot up. "Who's jacket it was?"
"It's okay damon." I smiled trying to lighten the mood up. I didn't want another pointless argument to start, especially because of a dumb jacket.
Damon threw his hands up in the air and groaned to himself, revealing he was tired of all of this. "It doesn't matter whose it was." He mumbled to himself.
Bringing his hand to my lower back Austin stood beside me. "It does matter." Austin whispered over to Damon as we passed him. I looked up at Austin as he stayed next to me, the smirk plastered on his face was way too clear for anyone not to notice it.
Austin's hand continued to rest on my lower back as he was leading us to the restaurant. Leaving Damon and Stella walking behind, Damon completely speechless but not as speechless as me I should say.
He opened the door to the restaurant as I walked in. Damon and Stella later on finally showing.
"Hello I'm Valerie and I'll be your waitress today." A brunette appeared in front of us smiling kindly. "Table for..." She looked behind Austin and I to count exactly how many people were present. "Four?" She finally asked.
"Actually we are eating separate." Austin replied to the waitress.
Austin looked over to me, I gave him a confused look but didn't bother to ask him what he was doing. I just wanted to eat in peace right now, but at the same time I still wanted all of us to eat together. Even though I knew that wasn't going to lead into anything good, I still wanted to.
"Seperate?" Damon's voice came from the back as he finally made his way to the front where all of us were. "We are eating together, ma'am." He corrected the waitress.
"Well you can eat together with Stella, Damon. But for us- it's a table for two." He ordered.
The waitress after such long time of finally deciding which side to give in to, took us to our table. She gave in to Austin, obviously considering the look he was giving her.
"Why did you do that?" I asked after ordering my food.
"Do what?" Austin said playing around with the subject, knowing exactly what I was talking about.
"That." I pointed to a table that was a few away from us where there sat Damon and Stella talking, Damon pissed extremely off.
Austin took a sip of his water and set the glass back on the table. "Nothing, I just didn't want to eat with those two."
"You're being a complete asshole." I stated.
Austin's eyes were placed on me, he let a laugh out and licked his lips after. "I'm surprised how you're not used to it by now."
"I'm getting used to you." I blurted out not even realizing.
His eyes beamed with amusement as if he didn't see that coming from me, and quite frankly neither did I.
"Oh really?" He asked with amusement, an actual real smile on his face. Wow I haven't seen one of those in a while.
"Y- yes." I said stuttering.
He didn't reply though, he stayed quiet.
"I always know when you're nervous or scared" Austin said. "You always stutter."
He was right, that was me; I always stuttered in those type of situations. It was weird how he always figured me out, as if I was a puzzle and he was a little kid trying to put all the pieces together.
After waiting a while for our food, it was finally brought to us. I inhaled the smell in as my tastebuds were tingling to taste that delicious food. Austin took no time in devouring his pizza along with his fries.
We weren't really talking; communicating. But it was nice just to sit here with no arguments, no death glares, no intense vibes, no nothing.
Through everything that I've been gone through here, I was feeling... okay. A whole lot better. There was still an empty whole inside me, but I'm planning on filling that up somehow.
"I'm getting used to you as well." He finally spoke, after minutes had passed by since I had blurted that out.
Austin's voice came in more loud to me than anything but it was nothing close to loud, it was humble and quiet.
It was calm.
I looked up at Austin to find him already looking at me. There was no expression there but his eyes felt like they had lit up the entire room.
So I replied with the only thing there was to reply to him; I smiled.
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