Addicted (OITNB)

6- Playground Kiss

I REST AGAINST the wall while I sit on my bed and watch Tricia across from me. I smile at the memory of yesterday- Tricia kissed me. It wasn't rough or a heated kiss, but it was short and gentle. The kind that kids do on a playground. No touching, no tongue action, just two lips pressed together.

The thought of it gives me goosebumps. My feelings for Tricia have escalated completely.

Tricia glances at me and notices me smiling as I'm lost in the memory. She chuckles and I snap out of it. I see her pull out a colorful notebook from under her pillow.

"What's that?" I ask as I stand up from my bed. Nicky was right- the beds were way more comfier in the dorms. And a nicer environment. Everyone seems closer and friendlier here.

I stretch out my limbs and yawn. I only woke up like ten minutes ago.

"It's my diary. Well, kinda like a diary." She says as she stares down at one of the pages with a weak smile.

"I hope I'm in it." I joke as I walk towards her. "Do you mind?" I point to her bed. I don't know if she wants me to see her diary.

"No, not at all." She scoots to the right, giving me more room to sit. Our arms press together as I lean over her shoulder to look at the diary.

The first thing that catches my attention are the prices. When I read more closely, I notice that they're items and foods written down as well as the price, the date and the place they were purchased.

"It has everyone I plan on paying back." She says sweetly as she flicks through the hundreds of pages.

"Paying back?"

"I borrowed these while I was homeless." She says quietly and I finally understand.

"You're so sweet." I whisper as I kiss her cheek and put a smile back on her face.

"Anyway, I still plan on doing this when I get out of here. Starting with the blanket I borrowed from Target." Tricia shuts the book and puts it back under her pillow. The girl has good intentions.

"You're a good person, Tricia." I say to her when I notice her staring down at her lap solemnly.

"I'm not. I shouldn't have stole. I should've just tried harder." Her voice shakes.

"What? No. You tried hard enough. I mean, look at how honest you were. I don't think anyone else would ever do what you're doing."

Tricia shakes her head. "They won't forgive me."

"What makes you feel that?"

"Cause' I've already tried paying back. That's what put me in this mess."

I throw my arms around Tricia and she leans onto me, resting her head on my shoulder.

"The past is the past now. Don't worry about it anymore." I tell her. She's serving her time here, I think that's punishment enough.

Tricia sniffs, but she isn't crying. 

"Well, I better go get cleaned up. Work starts soon." I say as I pull myself away from her and out of bed before gathering my bathroom necessities.

Before I leave, I take a glance at Tricia. She brings her knees up onto the bed and holds her face. I can tell something's wrong. She's looking awfully paler than usual. But I don't have time to ask her.