Do your boobs hang low? Do they wobble to and fro? Can you tie them in a knot? Can you tie them in a bow? Can you throw them over your shoulder like a continental soldier? Do your boobs hang low?
Do your boobs hang high? Do they reach up to the sky? Do they droop when they are wet? Do they stiffen when they're dry? Can you semaphore your neighbour with a minimum of labour? Do your boobs hang high?
Do your boobs flip-flop? Can you use them for a mop? Are they stringy at the bottom? Are they curly at the top? Can you use them for a swatter? Can you use them for a blotter? Do your boobs flip-flop? Do your boobs hang out? Can you waggle them about? Can you flip them up and down as you fly around the town? Can you shut them up for sure when you hear an awful bore? Do your boobs hang out?
Do your boobs stretch wide? Do they reach from side to side? Can you use them as a parachute or wings that let you glide? Can you cast a cooling shadow over most of Colorado? Do your boobs stretch wide?
Are your boobs too big? Are they heavy as a pig? Do they bruise your cerebellum when you dance an Irish jig? Can they function as the anchors for a fleet of oil tankers? Are your boobs too big?
Are your boobs real small? Barely visible at all? Do they look just like two peanuts stuck onto a bowling ball? Can you store them in a thimble when you're feeling rather nimble? Are your boobs real small?
Are your boobs quite clean? Do they have a lovely sheen? Did you harvest all the vegetables that grow down in between? Did you wash out all the soil after all your farming toil? Are your boobs quite clean?
Are your boobs so thin? Does the breezes make 'em spin? Can you shine a light right through them like the finest onionskin? Can you wrap up a salami? Do they fold like origami? Are your boobs so thin?
(sing to the popular children's song "Do your Ears Hang Low")