Consideration

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Three months pregnant and strong.

It's been the second time now and I hoped my pregnancy wasn't something new.

When I was pregnant with Connor, I didn't have the hardest time. It was hard, but not as hard as I thought it was going to be.

It was a Friday night and my son and I were on the couch watching tv.

Daddy/Husband Sammy Wilkinson was of course not home again.

He hasn't been at home for weeks and I kept seeing him at parties with the boys. Luckily, I knew he wasn't going to cheat on me. But I did bother that he was barely home.

I want my two kids to have a dad who was at least there for them, and not constantly getting drunk and high.

I put my son to bed and turned on Orphan Black while getting myself comfortable. I enjoyed alone time while Netflixing, but I missed my husband.

After a couple of hours of catching up on my favorite show, I fell asleep on the couch.

Until I heard the door open. The light suddenly turned on, "Oh sorry, babe." He slurred while drinking the whole pack of water.

"It's four in the morning." I said with a sleepy voice. "Can you please keep it down?" He was dropping everything in his way and it was making a shit load of noise.

"Sorry." He dryly said.

I walked towards him and grabbed his face, making him look me in the eyes. "High and drunk?" I asked while frowning.

He nodded while grinning. I on the other hand was done with this bullshit. "Sam, can I ask you just... one favor?"

Once again, he nodded and I asked him, "Please be home more."

"You can't tie me down." He responded, "I have a life besides you, you know."

"You think I don't?" I was looking for a fight and he knew it. "When was the last time you spent time with your son, huh?" I raised my voice little by little.

"All you do is get high and drunk with your friends, I'm very glad you don't do it in front of your kid, but you are constantly away."

"I have friends, who I want to hang out with. What do you expect me to do? Cut all ties with friends and lock myself in the house?"

"All I'm asking is a little attention for your son."

"He's fine."

All anger and disappointment started to boil in me, "Connor needs a father in his life, and you're obviously not going to be it." I sighed.

I had been thinking about this for a very long time, and I tried my hardest not to wake Connor. "I'm going to file for a divorce."

His face dropped, but then quickly recovered. "You can't take me away from my kid." He said.

"And now you suddenly want to be his dad?" I spat.

"Fucking bitch. You're not taking Connor away-"

"I am not taking Connor away from you!" I yelled out of a sudden. Sam backed down, "We are going to divorce, not you and Connor! God, you don't understand anything about this shit. I knew it was too early for this."

Sam stayed quiet while eating a pack of chips, "You are sleeping on the couch." I said as I walked upstairs and went to bed.

***

It's been a week ever since I told him that we were going to split.

Currently I was at the court house waiting for Sam to show up and sign his half of the papers. But as usual, he was late. "Shit, sorry!" He nearly yelled.

"Just sign the papers." I said while impatiently waiting for him.

He looked like he was about to say something, but quickly turned to the divorce papers.

I saw him reading in through but still doubting. "Wilkinson," he looked up at me and I said, "sign the papers."

He bit his lip and shook his head, "No."

"What?" I asked in disbelief. "Sign the papers." I repeated.

"No." He protested, "If I'm going to sign this, I know that I have made a terrible mistake."

I furrowed my brows, "I asked you to marry me because I love you. Because of wanting to have a family. Being happy. That's all I wanted with you. And I'm not going to throw that away because I'm such an idiot."

"Sam, please-"

"No, Y/N. I- I thought about what you said and you're right." He hated admitting that I was right. "I should've been more at home, with you guys. But instead I'm just... being a teenager."

He walked towards me and held my hands, "We can make this work. For you, and the kids." He nervously bit his lip and I hugged his torso. "I'm sorry."

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