The Music Within

Chapter 28| Why Would They Love Me?

So I'm going on my tour in a few weeks and everything is set, all I have to do is go. Tickets are being sold and there are probably less than a thousand tickets left. I have all my concert outfits, meet-ups and signings set up and ready.

I'm currently singing one of my songs in my music studio. As the tune plays out I sing the last bit before taking off my headphones and exiting the room. I open the door and Max, Scarlett and Conner all fly into the room.

"We're you guys listening?" I accuse.

They straighten up and look at me. "N-no? Why would you think that?" Max chuckles nervously.

I raise my eyebrows and he sighs softly. "Maybe?" he says wincing at is poor attempt of convincing me.

I cross my arms and wait for him to just tell me.

"We've been just... a little worried about you" he opens up.

I give him a blank look and he acts like he doesn't buy it.

"Ali, you've been eating less, practicing almost 24/7 and you've been talking less and you keep telling us that you're busy. Something's and we know it. Just tell us" Max says looking worried.

"What are you talking about?" I ask confused. What in the world are they talking about? I wouldn't do those kinds of things. That doesn't sound like me.

"You've been doing it for that past two weeks" Scarlett speaks up, "are you okay?"

I nod confused, "guys I'm fine" I tell them, but they don't buy it.

"Guys, I'm being serious, I'm fine, I'm okay, I'm great actually, perfect" I say but I find myself shaking for some reason.

"Ali, you know we don't believe you, just tell us what's going on" Conner pleads.

"I'm serious, I'm absolutely fine" I laugh nervously. Why won't they believe me? "It's not like I'm going to be traveling all over to perform in front of thousands of people at a time, I mean what could go wrong? I throw up on stage, forget some lines of the song? No biggie" I say quickly as my eyes dart around looking at everyone.

They all seemed to get even more nervous when they registered everything I just said.

"Is that why? You're just nervous for the tour?" Max says calmly.

I think over my previous words, and realize that they are right. Something is up with me, and I am nervous.

"I think, I am" I say softly looking down in realization.

"Ali.. there's nothing to be nervous about. Everyone there loves you and they're all there because they love you, okay?" Max says.

I give him a pained look because I don't really believe him.

I don't believe that they're all there for me. For all I know they're just waiting for me to embarrass myself and post all about it and make fun of me. As much as I hate it, I can't stop myself from thinking about it.

I don't think I can do it. Being famous is just getting too much for me and sometimes I regret continuing and being signed and I hate thinking like this, but I do.

Maybe being famous isn't for me.

"Ali, you do believe that right?" Max asks sympathetically.

"..What if I don't" I say as quiet as possible.

"Ali, people out there love you" he tries to convince me.

"Why would they? Why would they love me? Why me?" I ask them.

After seeing their faces I run away to my room and lock the door behind me when I hear their footsteps following me.

"Ali?" Scarlett says as the doorknob moves, but doesn't open.

As quiet as possible I leave through the window and sneak out. I walk around making sure to stay hidden and I reach the park and sit behind a tree.

Taking a shaky breath I turn off my phone ignoring all the calls and texts I'm receiving.

I don't think I can do this anymore. I'm getting too stressed and I don't know what to do.

I feel like everyone is out to catch my mistakes and that I have to be perfect and it's just.. It's all too much.

~*~*~*~*~*~

A/N: Hey guys! So I'm sorry for not updating. I know it's only been a few days but I feel like it's been longer. If you guys have seen my 'Conversations' on my profile you would know that I have just been really busy and that today (June 29) is my first day of summer break!

So I am busy this summer and my parents are really strict about being on electronics in the summer so updating will be a little more complex for me, but I'll figure it out.

I also restarted my Twitter account for more updates about my books and all that. You can find me under @owls_luv with Sarah7137 as my name. So check that out for some updates.

So what do you think Ali will do? What's gonna happen? Let me know what you think on this chapter in the comments, I'd love to know.

By the way, it's been decided that this book will have one more chapter and then the epilogue. So next chapter will the last chapter and it's a little deep so yeah. I already have everything written out so that's good.

I will have some bonus chapters after the epilogue and if you have any suggestions for that please comment them below. I also want to ask if you have any questions for the characters. If you do, I will gather all your questions and make a Q&A with them.

Hope you enjoyed! <3

-Sarah