The next day the Dr. Martinez went over Brielle's CT scans with me. He showed me the areas of her brain that were still swollen and expressed his concerns of taking her off of the life support too soon.
"Look, her squeezing your hand only shows that she can subconsciously hear you and is still in there. It doesn't show that she is ready to come off the life support. I want to allow her brain's swelling to continue to go down and be able to monitor exactly how her body is coming along strength wise. She needs to have enough strength to breath on her own, she was barely able to grasp your hand. I am going to keep her on life support for another week and then we will talk about taking her off, hopefully by next Sunday. Until then all I can say is for you to be patient, we can't do things too quickly because that could be putting her life in jeopardy and I know you don't want that."
I nodded. "You're right." I shook his hand before going back into Brielle's room. I had already given the nurse back the folded up blanket. I put my hand on her hair, kissed her forehead as I looked down at her, gently rubbing her forehead with my thumb.
"My beautiful fiancé... my best friend. Brielle, I love you. Don't leave me. Keep fighting yourself and wake up baby. I have to go but will be back before you know it," I said gently kissing her once more before leaving the room.
I woke up in a bright room. Sitting up I observed everything around me but, something was missing. Actually a little more than just something, it was more like everything. There was no furniture, in fact I'd woken up on the floor of the room, there was no door and I don't even know where the light that illuminated this room was coming from.
I began walking but honestly, I have no clue where I am trying to go. Stopping I decided to do the only rational thing I had left in my arsenal.
"Hello!" I yelled with my hand cupped around my mouth. "Is anyone here? Can any one help me?" I waited for a reply but all I got were echoes off the walls from my own voice. I cupped my hands around my mouth, getting ready to shout again but a voice came over the room.
Alright already, a female voice said in a southern voice just like mine, you yellin' isn't going to do ya any good.
"Well, how else am I supposed to get any help?"
Well I can tell you right now, honey, yellin' won't help you here, She replied.
"Where exactly is here? I have no clue where I am, there isn't even a door out. Do you know how long I've been asleep for too?"
Woah now, cowgirl, calm your roll with the questions. They'll all get answered in due time. Don't you think the first question you should ask isn't where are you but how do you get out?
"No, I think asking 'where am I?' is just as relevant a question as 'how do I get out?'. If I know where I am, it would be the first step in knowing how to get out."
Alright then, you make a valid point. You are in a sort of in limbo within your mind, the area between life and death. Like a netherland. Your earthly body is fighting for life but here your subconscious is alive and well. Your brain is currently trying to repair itself so in the meantime you have to stay here until you are well enough to be able to go back to reality, if you can go back based on your brain's condition.
"What the—," now, now I am about to panic. "I'm not dead, am I?" I screeched, "I can't be! I am supposed to marry the man of my dreams, the love of my life, my best friend in nine months! I can't die before I even live!"
Brielle, would you calm down. You aren't dead. Did I say you were dead? No, I said you aren't awake and that you are in a sort of netherland in your brain because it's severely damaged and repairing. Don't you start panicking because this would be the perfect time for you to begin to see what you have a could lose because of your insecurities.
"And how can I do that? You don't know me? I can't even see you! You're just a voice in a room with no furniture illuminated by some invisible bulbs or some crap like that. I am going to fall back, because I obviously hit my head hard in the accident, and jerk myself awake."
I took a deep breath and fell back but landed on something soft. Opening my eyes I realized that a mattress was now under me.
Look, you doh doh bird, you're already knocked out. That's why you're here. We don't need another head injury and especially not one in your subconscious brain, so chill out. And on the contrary, I do know you. Because I am you,
The voice sounded more grounded at the end like it was right behind me. I turned around to face...myself. An exact replica of myself.
I blinked a million times and rubbed my eyes to make sure I wasn't dreaming. This can't be real, I have to be dreaming. I have to be dreaming.
"Would you stop rubbing my eyes already," she said taking my hands and bringing them to my sides. "I am real and you aren't imagining anything. So," she said smirking at me as she cocked her head to one side and folding her arms, "Let's talk about Levi, oh! And your issues because we could be in here for a couple of weeks, probably months just all depends on how long it takes us to get down to the bottom of it all."
All I could do was drop my mouth open slightly. Dear god, what have I gotten into?
I got out of the steamy bathroom and headed into Brielle and I's room. I stopped at the threshold looking into it, my heart twisting because I wasn't coming out to her laying in one of my old shirts too big for her, and that she wasn't laughing a something she was reading or watching. I miss everything about her.
Sighing, I walked to the closet and pulled out a black shirt, then immediately put it back in because when I look at that color now, all I can think about is death and I don't need that thought in my head. I pulled out a white V-neck shirt, dark blue jeans, and Hanes boxers. I didn't even look at her side of the closet.
I got dressed, putting on ankle socks and my white boat shoes. I dried my damp hair that was beginning to wave up with the towel, grabbed my keys and headed down to Noah and Shania's. I'd go by both mine and Brielle's parents before coming back to go to the hospital.
YOU ARE READING
Where It All StartedRomance
Brielle Jackson and Levi Miller have been through hell and back together. They've faced adversity through racial differences when it comes to their relationship of four years coming out stronger than ever. Just when everything seems to be going grea...