So Hot

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Once again,
Eunice takes the initiative
and decides to try and
remedy my social life
even more than she
has already attempted to.
After school today, she
informs me that she and
her group of track friends
are going to see a movie
tomorrow night, and that
they all want me
to come along as well.
It might have been flattering
if it wasn't for the fact
that I'm almost certain
it was Euni's idea
in the first place,
not theirs.

Trevor, in his
parents' minivan,
is the designated driver
for the evening.
The rest of the group
is already piled in
the backseat when
he pulls up in front
of our house Saturday night,
honks his horn,
and proceeds to get yelled at
by a nosy neighbor.
From inside the house,
Mom rolls her eyes
and tells Eunice to take care of me
and to be smart
with our decisions.
I'm not entirely sure
if my sister is
the one to be trusted
with our safety, but
I don't say anything.

"Hey, guys!"
Eunice calls as she
jumps into the shotgun seat,
leaving me alone
in the middle row.
The three backseat dwellers
call forward a hello
to us as Trevor
guns the engine
and speeds off down the street.
It might have been exciting
if I wasn't so worried
that he would run into
a parked car
or a pedestrian.

The plan is
to see an earlier showing
of whatever movie they had picked,
and then grab some dinner
afterwards.
That doesn't end up
working out, because
Darien, who had been
in charge of the movie times,
got it wrong, and we
end up being half an hour
late to the showing
we had selected.
I halfway expect
everyone else to be
frustrated with him,
or at least mildly irritated,
but they only laugh
and wonder aloud
why he always screws things up
and why they always
trust him with these things
when they know what
the end result will be.

Their mindless banter
almost comes as
a relief to me.
Maybe Eunice's friends
are just as airheaded
as she is.
And you know,
people without brains
are the kindest you'll ever meet.

So we go to dinner first,
and all end up crowded
into a booth at
some Chinese place
that I can't even pronounce.
It's a little on the
expensive side, so we
order a few dishes
to share.
Euni says the boys will
end up eating everything
and leave none for the rest of us,
and when they disagree,
she makes them promise
to eat only
one piece of kung pao chicken
each.
They, of course,
refuse rather loudly.

I don't think I've
laughed so much
as I have tonight.
Between my sister's friends' antics
and their pitiful attempts
at humor,
I can slowly
feel myself settling in,
becoming more used to
their little group.
I don't know if
I'll ever completely feel
as though I fit in,
but this is definitely
a start.

We finally make it
to the movie
and all crowd into a row
of seats near the front.
Trevor and Ashlyn start a
popcorn war, and
Martha catches the stray pieces
that fly her way
in her mouth.
When the lights dim, it takes
both Euni and I to
quiet them all -
with the exception of Darien,
because he seems
to have fallen asleep already.
Finally, they fall into silence,
and the movie begins.

I probably should have
expected some cliché romance,
because even though it isn't
the sole focus of the movie,
when do they not
slip those types of things in?
Trevor mutters complaints
under his breath from
a few seats away, saying
that he hadn't signed up
for a chick flick -
but Ashlyn quickly
silences him
with an elbow to the ribs
and a reminder that
they're practically a chick flick
themselves
since they're dating.

He isn't the only one
to feel uncomfortable
about this turn of events, though.
I don't know why,
but the way the female lead
keeps looking at
the male protagonist
almost makes me squirm
in my seat.
Something about it
doesn't exactly
sir right with me, I guess.
I don't really know
how to describe it, but
it makes me a little
uncomfortable.
Maybe it's just because
I've never really seen
many 'chick flicks' before,
since my family seems
to watch just the opposite
on our TV on a
daily basis.

Both Trevor and I
breathe out a sigh of relief
when that part is over,
and we're returned to
our regularly scheduled programing.

It's not until we're back
in Trevor's minivan that
the boys start gushing
about how good the movie was,
and the other girls about
how cute the lead actor was.
"Wasn't he, Matty?"
Euni asks me
at one point.
"He's just so
hot-"

"I'd tap that,"
Ashlyn pipes up
from behind us,
smirking devilishly -
which results in an
indignant snort from
her boyfriend.

"Ditto,"
says Martha
in all seriousness -
and then all eyes
turn to me.
It's like I'm back
in the movie again,
watching the male and female leads,
feeling as though there is
something very wrong
with the situation.

So I say the first thing
that comes to mind.

"The girl was
really pretty, too..."
I tell them,
wincing at how feeble
I sound.
"What was her name again..."

"Well,
yeah,"
Eunice says
with a small frown.
"I mean,
her makeup was on point,
and her hair too -
but he was smokin',
Matty,
wasn't he?"

I'm saved from answering
by Trevor, who
bumps to a stop
right in front of our house.
"Enough of the fangirling,"
he groans.
"I think I'm going
to be sick."

Everyone else laughs
as my sister and I
jump out,
but I can't seem to
feel anything besides
a queasy uneasiness,
a sense of wrongness
that has pervaded all else.
Not for the first time,
I wonder
just what is wrong with me.

"You alright?"
Euni asks as she
opens the front door
for us.
"You don't look
so good."

"I'm fine,"
I lie,
ignoring her
worried stare.
"I think it was just
that Chinese food."

And as she shrugs
and turns away,
I wonder if I could
convince myself
with that lie, too.

×

Poor Matty. I love her to death but then I keep giving her stuff to struggle with and... Yeah, whoops. I still love her, though. I really do.

I hope her little inner turmoil thing here is at least somewhat relatable because I sort of drew on my own experiences of being asexual ?? I know that's not the same thing, but at least in this situation, it is somewhat similar, so idk. I'm sorry if I'm not making the most sense, I just woke uo so yeahhhh...

If you guys liked this chapter, I'd love if you would vote and leave me some feedback! It would be very much appreciated c:

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