This chapter is not starting off with a flashback okay...what you are about to read is not a flashback!!!!!
Evil Inside Of The Righteous
Entry #: 3458
Journal #: 102
Title: Memory of The Lost
I'm going with the motion
Flowing like the ocean
One with the wind,
Letting this man under my skin.
Questioning his love,
Is it truly what I deserve?
Or is my love what he deserves.
I'm not a fool— I'm a damn fool
I know his truths, but yet I act blind.
Truth be told I am the all seeing eye when it comes to his lies.
Oh tell me do you love me? I ask
Of course! He replies, eyes on mine, slowly drifting down to my thighs.
Silly naive child, don't let his husky voice and tall stature fool you. That man is only out to use you!
I hear her wise voice guiding me, enlightening me— I listen.
Oh yes I listen.
I take heed.
Waiting for my moment to flee and reveal his evil deeds.
I am alone, but I have the souls of a nation of fighting women within me.
As long as they live through me.....I will forever be free. I am the instrument the one that plays only once within
A life time, but if you grab a hold of me and stroke me in a different universe, my life's
Story will be yours to hold, my pained beginning will forever haunt your soul.
But with my mind, and that other mind...
There's no telling the tune that I may play.
I write something new in you everyday but it still doesn't take the pain away. I feel so— so foolish sitting here writing in you, confining into you like you're some type of person. Like someway, somehow you will just come to life and comfort me. A journal is a good way to release your problems, but it's nothing like having a person there to talk to. With them you can at least get a response. Or an opinion— some advice even.
But I mean, you're not that bad. You're kinda like those friends I don't have, but then again I have to think of my new rekindled friendships. You know Austin, the one I was telling about all that time ago? Well, he's back!
I couldn't be happier, its been nice having someone else around other than Damon. Don't get me wrong I love his company, but Austin was there through everything, you see he's seen me at my very lowest— not even Kendrick ever seen me at such low terrible points.
I chuckled as I remembered all the things Austin did to make sure I was alright.
I remember he came all the way to my house and climbed through my window, all because I said I wasn't feeling well. It always amazed me how he went through hell just for me— even though hell is exactly where we started and ended. That boy would have sacrificed his life for me— and I knew that because I would have did the same. Do you know how hard it was for me to get him to such a point? And my foolish simple minded ass ruined that. I left him there thinking that it was his fault.
YOU ARE READING
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