Part 22 - His Sides and His Trap

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I woke, with a pair of soft lips over my own, and for a second I enjoyed the feeling. I liked it, and I moaned into the kiss while pushing my lips forwards. The other person moaned as well, and I moved my arms so that they were wrapped around the other persons' neck, but then I opened my eyes and found myself staring into Jako's dazed face. I leaned away, and pushed him back, wiping my mouth. Blushing, I looked away, a hand still on my mouth.

"What the hell? Why were you kissing me?"

He shrugged and I realized that his face was red as he stared at the chair in front of him, definitely in a daze.

"I don't know. I heard that if you kiss someone when they wake up they might kiss you back. Didn't know that would feel so good though," he glanced at me. "Where'd you learn to kiss like that? You make me want to share more kisses with you since we are in a relationship." He said, winking at me and licking hit bottom lip sexily, causing my heart to thump.

"Oh, shut up." I said hitting his arm. "And if you ever do that again, I'm going to kill you." He leaned towards me, his lips right by ear. I tried to lean away, but he just followed me. He placed one hand on my thigh, causing my face to explode and lowered his voice to something husky.

"Don't worry. I plan to make out with you a lot more, not on a bus, and certainly with less on and around us."

"Ah," I said, putting my hand on his face and pushing him away. "Stop being gross." I said, looking away from him and picking up my phone with my free hand.

"Why is that gross? Girls usually love making out with me. Is it because of Kadri?"

I tensed at his name. I name I hadn't thought about during the past day. Just at hearing his name my heartbeat sped up, and I felt my face warm at the memory of the last time I saw him. I looked away, my jaw clenching unwillingly.

"What about Kadri?"

"He's been weird these last few days. He mentioned that he was going on vacation."

I turned my eyes on him.


"Far away."

My heart throbbed.


"To get away from you...obviously." He turned his head towards me, eyes cold, as if he really meant those cruel words. My heart clenched in my chest, and I could feel tears wanting to fall, and then I felt anger.

"Why would you say that to me?" I asked, my voice sharp. Not just why would he say that to me? Why would he say that to me while we were going to be trapped next to each other on a bus for hours? 

"Because you should give up on him and date me instead."

"Ah, shut up. I'm going to sleep." I huffed, seriously pissed off, with my eye twitching. I leaned away from him, pulling my legs up against my chest. "You already kissed me and hurt my feelings. Isn't that enough for you?" Before I could hear his response I turned my my music and stared out of the window.

Kadri was going away? 

Was it really because of me?

I wouldn't doubt it. He kissed a minor, not that anyone knew, but wouldn't that be enough to scare him away? I sighed, and shut my eyes, pulling my sweater further up, and leaned against the chair, letting myself melt into a realm where me and Kadri loved each other and lived together, and there was no me being a minor.

It was simpler.



I sat at my desk, my eyes frozen on the glaring screen in front of me. My mind wasn't with the form I was staring at. I felt as if I was in another place. I felt as if I wanted to be in another place. I felt myself drifting.

"Doctor?" Ms.Yunoi said, her brows furrowed as she sat besides her son with the broken arm. I cleared my throat and pulled up the image of her sons arm.

"Yes, I'm sorry. I've had a lot on my mind recently. Excuse me." I forced an awkward laugh, but she didn't mind.

"You know, you should go on a trip if you're feeling down. The cold season is coming fast, and I'm sure you'll be busy. Now's the time. Me and Leslie don't mind waiting." I smiled at her, and then turned back to the photo of his bones.

"Thanks. I was thinking about leaving soon anyway." 

"Oh when?"

"December 23."

"Right before Christmas?"

"Someone I know has a birthday right before then, and I don't know-.Anyway, it doesn't matter. So, it looks like the reason he broke is arm is because he-" I jumped as my phone buzzed on the desk. I reached for it, ready to turn it off, but then thought about it. I grabbed my phone and turned towards the woman, apologetically.

"Excuse me for a second."

She waved her hand.

"Of course."

"Hello?" I asked, rising, to step out for a second. I grabbed the door handle and closed the door behind me, standing in the empty hall.

"It's Kadri." He announced, and I rolled my eyes, but his voice was softer than usual.

"Great, I have caller ID."

"Look, I have a chess tournament in DC tonight and tomorrow. Turns out, I need a parent to come and we all know you're all I have, right?"

I paused.

It was true. I was all he had, but something felt strange. He didn't usually announce that. Usually, he was perfect and untainted. He was Jako. The soccer god at school. The guy who no one could take down.

But I knew him.

I'd seen all the sides of him.

The sides he'd never have wanted anyone to see. The sides that even reminded me of my older brother at times. The sides that made me wonder just if he was perfectly sane. If I needed to have him checked in somewhere.

And the fact that it was me that had seen all of these sides did mean I was all he had.

"So?" He asked, his voice still achingly soft. As if he were hiding it.

"Fine. Just send me the address." I hung up, slipping my phone into my pocket, and turned, heading back into the room.


I sighed and hung up the phone. I glanced at Lila, curled up, and lying against the window of the bus. Her lips were parted slightly, and once again I found myself drawn in. I cleared my throat and looked away.

Don't get confused Jako.

She doesn't love you.

She doesn't even like you.

"You're going to have to thank me when you wake up." I murmured, trying to keep my gaze from her face. Her heart wasn't mine, and even if I kept trying it would never be because I would never be Jako in her eyes. She'll always just see the person who I'm pretending to be as false. She won't be convinced.

Maybe that's why I-


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