Clover Village

Chapter 21 - Seaside Tourists

JESSE

"I promise I will come and visit often," Sierra says.

We are standing next to her car where I just placed her suitcase and her memories of Clover Village.

Talking is difficult for me right now. I have been trying not to cry the whole morning. I feel as if someone has ripped my heart from my chest.

Eric and Sue are happy and in love, and I'm glad for them, but I feel jealous. Juan told me I'm an idiot, falling in love with a girl that I just met. I replied that my siblings know their significant ones also for a very short time. He said that Ellen has been living here for a few months already and that Harry has lived in the village for many years now.

Two weeks or seven years doesn't make a difference in how I feel about Sierra. She is the woman of my dreams. I'm not as cool and collected as Eric, or as determined and logical as Sue. I'm chaotic, passionate, spontaneous, even a fucking lunatic at times. Sierra likes me just the way I am.

"I wonder what is going through your head. You have barely talked to me since yesterday," she says, caressing my cheek.

"I..." is all I get to say before breaking down into tears.

Sierra places her arms around my waist while I hug her. I don't want to let her go.

"Jesse, if this between us is meant to be, it will work out by itself. Don't be sad. This is not a goodbye."

Sierra gives me sweet kisses on my lips and then gets in her car. I don't look as she drives away. I just can't.

I head inside the empty house. Sue is with Harry at Cloverfield, and I brought Eric to Ellen's cottage this morning.

I look around and everything reminds me of Sierra. I grew up in this house, but the whole place got a special meaning in the last weeks. The breakfast counter where we shared a bowl of soup on the day we met; the old couch where we spent so many hours talking; my bed where we cuddled and slept together.

I lay in my bed. This room that normally is so hot feels cold without her in it. I hold on to the pillow she used to sleep on and inhale her lovely scent. My chest feels tight, and I can't contain my sadness.

"Jesse?" Eric says.

I didn't even hear him coming up the stairs. He sits on my bed with his injured leg stretched and puts his crutches on the floor.

"How did you get here?" I say, sitting on the bed and cleaning my eyes.

"I got a ride. I wanted to see Sierra, but seems that I'm too late," he says with sadness.

We hear footsteps on the stairs. Sue walks into my room.

"Are you okay?" She says with a concerned face when she sees me.

"No," I say before breaking down again.

Sue rubs my back to soothe me.

"I'm sorry," I say, cleaning my nose on my sleeve. "This fucking hurts."

"Heartbreak is a terrible feeling," Eric says.

"How did you get over it?" I ask.

"Time is the only thing that heals it," he replies.

"Time sucks," I say, sulking.

"Jesse, Sierra cares about you and nowadays there are so many ways of communicating. Of course, they can't replace the physical contact, but you can see each other," Sue says.

"I guess I will have to learn to use my computer for something else than searches about pottery," I say with a shrug.

"You can also visit her. I know you are not fond of driving long distances, but I guess she is worth it," Eric says.

"It's an option. She said that she will visit," I say and feel hopeful. "Can we do something tonight? I need the distraction."

"I have a better idea," Eric says. "Why don't we go to Mom and Dad for a few days? We haven't seen them in a while, and we can let Mom fuss over us."

"Can we afford it?" I say, worrying about money as always.

"We can, Jesse. Don't worry. Let's go out for dinner and find some flights," Eric says.

"But the business and the pending jobs?"

"We deserve a vacation from time to time. Clover will survive without us," Sue says.

"I can reschedule the jobs I have pending. They weren't emergency repairs," Eric says, scratching his puckered scar.

"What about Harry and Ellen?" I ask.

"Ellen will find it okay. She is doing much better now that she is sleeping on a proper bed. She is also busy with the construction. Edith's husband is a great match to help her. He even got her stuff out of the caravan and brought everything to her cottage."

"That is very sweet of him," Sue says. "I also don't think that Harry will have a problem with it. Mrs. Constance is spoiling the hell out of him. He thinks of her as a mom, and she loves him to pieces."

"Okay, then I guess we are going on a little trip," I say.

I take a shower and change into clean clothes. Eric and Sue are waiting for me in the car as I come outside. I drive us to Sea Glass Beach and park at a restaurant. We get a table by the window and order some drinks while browsing the menu.

"I don't want to sound greedy, but I really can't make my mind," Sue says while looking at the menu.

"I want the fried cod bits with the sweet potatoes," Eric says.

"Make it two," I say. "I have to go to the bathroom. Sue, don't let him touch my beer when it arrives."

"I'm taking painkillers; I can't drink," Eric protests.

"I don't trust you," I say, and he gives me a wicked grin.

I do my business, and as I come out of the bathroom, someone pulls me by my arm and into a dark storage. The light turns on, and Karina stands in front of me.

"Karina, what are you doing here?" I say as her hands rub my chest.

"I work here as a barmaid."

"What do you want?"

"I want to do what I should have done a while ago," she says close to my lips.

Her hands travel to the zipper of my jeans, and I hold them before she can do anything.

"Karina-"

"What? You can't use the pity excuse of that you are together with that writer wannabe. I know for a fact that she left you."

My heart hurts at the truth and harshness of her words.

"How do you know that?" I say, taking a step back.

"She had a drink here before heading to whatever shithole where she lives. Come on, Jesse. We are both single now. Let's have some fun."

"No, leave me in peace. I love Sierra, and we will be together no matter what."

"You are a blind idiot. Don't you see she used you for a place to sleep while writing the worthless book? I bet you didn't even have sex with her."

I look for the doorknob and leave the room. Karina's words have filled my mind with doubts, and my heart feels more broken than ever.