Why, why, WHY had you ever believed that hedgehog dressed in a jumper?
Maybe Sherlock was right. Maybe you really were an idiot.
He would probably remind you if you asked. After all he was sitting across from you at the table.
When you had climbed the stairs and knocked on the upstairs flat's door at exactly six o clock you should've noticed the sound of a violin playing. You should've remembered that John doesn't play the violin. Mrs. Hudson had told you who in the flat did ages ago. You shouldn't have entered the flat and let John close and lock the door behind you. You shouldn't have let him explain why he had lied about Sherlock being out. You shouldn't have let him restrain you from attacking Sherlock again. And you shouldn't have let him convince you to sit across from the freaking arse.
"So, (YN)," began John trying to defuse the tension that had risen across the table, "Where do you work again?"
"She used to work at the café across from Saint Barts but she was unfortunately dismissed yesterday," Sherlock stated sending you a smug look.
Your grip tightened on your fork as you restrained the urge to plunge it into the detective's eye socket.
"Due to some dimwitted customers who have nothing better to do than infuriate the employees," you said tensely.
"Former employees as it turns out," smirked Sherlock.
John glared between the two of you and slammed his fork and knife down on the table causing both of you to turn to him in surprise.
"BOTH OF YOU QUIT THIS!" he yelled causing you to wince and Sherlock to roll his eyes.
"SHERLOCK APOLOGIZE AND (YN) FORGIVE HIM!"
Sherlock sighed as he dropped his napkin on his plate delicately.
"No, John. I do not wish to lie and say that I regret my actions. It was most entertaining and I would do it again in a heartbeat."
You could nearly strangle the detective but instead merely threw your spoon at his nose. He turned away but it hit him right on the bruise from your punch. A small noise of pain escaped Sherlock as a smile grew on your face. A smile which did not quite reach your eyes.
"(YN) (LN)!" cried John in anguish.
"Yes?" you smirked innocently.
Now it was your turn to roll your eyes.
"I'm not the one who locked me in a room with a cruel, arrogant, pigheaded, no good, rotten, stuck up, airhead."
"Anything you want to add to that list?" Sherlock asked sarcastically as he stood up.
"Quite a few things yes," you snarled back standing up as well.
"What are they?" Sherlock asked taking a step closer.
"That you are exceptionally horrible to Molly and other people THAT YOU'VE NEVER MET! Oh yes hi that's me. I don't care that you can "deduct"," you said hastily as he opened his mouth to argue. "It doesn't excuse your behavior," you finished before adding, "Oh and if you weren't aware your behavior is equivalent to that of a two-year-old."
"Equivalent, exceptionally, deduct, such big words for such a small individual," Sherlock snarkily replied.
Not all humans were granted the privilege of being tall. You were about 5'5 which is average. VERY AVERAGE OKAY! NOT SHORT! But of course stupid Mr. Holmes had to go pointing it out.