I wish I could say it did not hurt me. I am very sensible to such comments but it did not take much to shake away the bad feelings temporarily and put on a smile and move on. Some may say that I contradict myself by doing so as I have always said honesty matters most but then again, it is not faking a smile. It is putting on a brave face and understanding the other person instead of letting it all get to you which as a result only makes everything worst.
He was always serious with me, rare were the moments where we would joke and if we did, he would be mainly telling me to either shut up, stop or 'refrain from smilling like that'.
He cared for me, he did, in a way no one ever did. He cared for me in his own words and I received his messages even when we didn't talk.
Question is, why fight? Why fight when those silly conflicts could be avoided? I liked fighting with him, I loved annoying him. I constantly wish to poke through his life, ask him about what are his opinions upon different, meaningful and inspiring themes that we get to experience and feel through out our life. I liked seeing his nose flare when I keep asking questions. I liked the thrill I got when he would look at me whenever I interrupt or even play against him.
I fight with him because I want to.
There are some certain beliefs I don't agree with but the concept of life and coincidences being cards played by fate is not one of the beliefs that I cannot accept.
I believe I was destined to meet him.
While, some of my questions might be proding about why I fight with him or even play against him, I know for sure that it is how it is supposed to play out.
Call me stupid, call me foolish.
I would rather be foolish, stupid and even heartless if it meant going with what my guts was telling me to go for.
The boy with the sneer comebacks, the boy with the caring glances, the boy with the warm hands, the boy with the complexed mind, the boy who called himself Batman might just be the boy I was destined to meet.
And maybe while we whine about life, death, other planets and even the meaning of truth, I might even find out if fate really had something to do with it or not.
Well for now, all I can do is hope tomorrow goes well and I can get him to joke with me.
And not piss him off.