Ten Things

Ch.34-Final Wish

Grace

I wanted to go on this adventure with Cole. With all my heart. There was nothing else I wanted to do. The fact that my mother would most likely have a conniption over it was beside the point. The doctors and her may be trying to hide it from me for as long as possible, but I’ve always been resourceful. I knew the cancer was spreading. I knew the tumor was growing. I knew they weren’t sure they could stop it this time.

So the way I got it figured, if I was dying, didn’t I get a dying wish?

It made sense to me.

I wasn’t allowed back in school anymore. The doctors didn’t even really want me leaving the hospital. I felt chained, abandoned, like they had already given up on me and were just trying to make the passing more comfortable. But I could feel it in my bones. I still had a few good days left. I wished they would just let me live them. Like Cole. Cole should be a doctor.

The door to my room opened and my mother walked through, a small smile gracing her face. I wondered if she really felt it. She wasn’t wearing mascara; I wondered if that meant she had been crying a lot.

“Hi, Mom,” I greeted, and I found it just wrong that even though I was the one dying, I was the noticeably more happier one of us.

“Hi, Gracie,” she greeted, taking her seat across from me. “How are you doing?”

“Good,” I stated with a small shrug of my shoulders. “It’s kind of like when I was a kid. Except less scary. And there are more needles.”

She winced. “Are you tired?”

“A little.”

“Hungry?”

“Not really.

“Can I get you anything?”

Yeah, the cure for cancer would be great. “Actually, there was something I wanted to ask you about.”

“Oh?” She scooted forward in her chair. “What’s that?”

I bunched the blanket over me in my hands. “Cole stopped by yesterday.”

She smiled. “Oh? That was nice of him.”

“Uh-huh.” I raised my hand to scratch my head, frowning when I realized the monitor attached to my index finger prevented me from doing so.

“What did he have to say?”

“He, um . . . He told me school was doing well. They put the trophy up in the front of the school.”

“Yeah?”

I nodded. “And he—uh—wants to take me somewhere.” I finished the last part in a hushed tone, partially hoping she hadn’t heard me.

“He wants to take you somewhere?” she parroted, frowning. “Where?”

“I don’t know,” I admitted. “But Mom, I want to go.”

She was shaking her head before my sentence was even finished. “No, Grace. Absolutely not. You need to stay here where the doctors can take care of you.”

I had been expecting the response, but it didn’t make it any less agitating. “Mom, can you just think about it? I won’t get this chance again.”

She turned her bright eyes on me. “Don’t you dare say that.”

“But it’s true!” I shouted, louder than I had ever raised my voice before. Her eyes were wide at the volume of my words. “You know it as well as I do, Mom! Hell, how long do I have? Three weeks? I wouldn’t know though since you insist on keeping my life expectancy from me.”