I Was, I Am.

-THE MEETING-

"Is this some kind of a joke Aditi?"

"No Papa. Why would I joke about something like this?"

"Aditi..." Papa sighed; and my heart skipped a beat at his expression.

What is he going to say?

"...I whole heartedly supported your decision to join SENSES. But I'm sorry; I cannot support you in this."

It is quite difficult to explain what I felt that instant.

Angry? Hurt? Confused?

It was a mix of them all.

But despite all of this mental turmoil; I was surprised to realize I wanted it. I wanted the startup to happen; and I was going to make it happen anyhow.

I took a deep breath; as I took a seat next to Papa and started;

"Dev and I have thought this through-"

"-and I don't see why your boss would want you to be a part of his business idea." He cut.

"Is there something we should know Aditi?" Ma asked with a horribly straight face.

Don't gulp Aditi; she'll know. I can't let them know till I'm absolutely sure.

And somehow; I managed to control the gulp I desperately needed; and which had always been the giveaway for any of my lies.

"You should know that I want to do this; and that I have weighed my options and I understand the financial turmoil we will go through. But you yourself had told me Papa; that I can fulfil my dreams in this span of four years that is left for you to retire. That's exactly what I'm doing-"

"-but what about SENSES?" he interrupted again.

He was right. What about SENSES?

My dream had always been to work in SENSES. And that I did. Then why did this startup suddenly mean so much to me?

"It...It was never SENSES. It was designing. And I'll be designing for myself; without any restrictions. What else could I want?"

It was a lie. My dream had been SENSES. And I needed time; just to sort my feelings and to know what this sudden splurge of emotions for Dev meant.

Do I want this because I want to be with Dev?

But then if I want to be with Dev why have I been running away from any commitment?

I couldn't let Ma and Papa sense my mental turmoil; and so I smiled.

"What about the finances beta?" Ma posed this time.

"Dev and I've find ourselves a Venture Capitalist. And the best part..." I continued; turning towards Papa, "...is that she happens to be one of his schoolmates. Ma; Papa; we have thought through everything. All I want is for you two to understand."

"And what if this fails?"

"You've always taught me to give my all and leave the rest to God."

Ma sighed deeply; and then looked up at me. Much to my surprise; I was rewarded with a smile. I grinned realizing; she was blessing me.

I turned towards Papa thereafter; who still didn't seem to meet my gaze.

"Harsh..." Ma spoke softly to Papa causing him to look up at her. A weird look of understanding passed in their eyes' and then he spoke with a business like tone;

"I want to meet this boy; Dev. I need to know with who you're getting into this."

I flashed my teeth at him at that; hugging him in a warm embrace.