C h a p t e r | N i n e t e e n
Present Day - Mikey
A party just isn't a party for Mikey Way without a heartbreak.
He tells himself this will be the last time he drinks until he's twenty-one, or at least until he moves out of Belleville and builds a new life for himself. He is a gilded, barely roistering youth, up until now intent on ending his own life by the end of the year. Now he can start to imagine a glimpse of January, the thin snow sheets that fall with that blue feeling. Resolutions of weight loss and good habits. He wants a head start, and that begins with cutting out alcohol cold turkey.
This is the last night, he swears.
Patrick and his circle of friends aren't feeling talkative, still unsure what to think about Pete. Rumours have spread like a disease. Mikey neither confirms nor denies any of them. They're some miles out of town, shadows of trees covering their tiny bodies and reckless mistakes. There's a bonfire, a pathetic attempt at making a stand, which roasts their marshmallows and warms their palms.
"Apparently Frank was a vegetarian," someone says in poor jest, "I wonder if he was the kind that ate marshmallows anyway. Screw the rules and all."
Mikey reckons if he were a vegetarian, he'd divulge every once in a while. The fluffy treats are a luxury he wouldn't want to give up so fast. "It's kind of funny," he muses, pouring himself a shot of whiskey into a bottle cap.
The others sip on their own plastic cups, chasing intoxication. He's already halfway there.
"What's funny?" Patrick asks.
"That he was a vegetarian. They're supposed to care about animal rights and then he killed a bunch of teenagers." Okay, out loud, it doesn't sound so hilarious. His sense of humour has gone to hell but if he doesn't laugh, he'll cry or drink himself to death. He's a long way from over it.
There's some low chuckles from the group, trying to make him feel included, but Patrick hardly cracks a smile. "Are we really gonna sit in this clearing all night and talk about the psycho who scarred us for life?" He raises his solo cup filled with cheap beer, making an impromptu toast. "Here's to new opportunities. Here's to Andy Hurley and finally skipping town."
Mikey stammers a 'cheers' then has to ask, "What - who are you talking about?"
"He's our drummer," Patrick informs him, talking about his band, and then his voice goes low in remorse, "who's moving to Chicago."
"You're moving to Chicago?" Mikey repeats dumbly. The whole band? That would include Pete except...
"We've heard enough about the case - or rather, we've seen you refuse to talk about it and we can assume it's pretty bad." Patrick holds a marshmallow over the fire. "None of us want to stay here and we're not going to let Pete's drama hold us back. I know he's getting locked up, Miko." He shakes his head to stop Mikey from interrupting. "So yeah, there's an opening for a bassist." He looks at the younger, vulnerable boy and asks him an impossibly huge question. "Are you coming?"
Chicago. His New Year, his fresh start. But he can't, and this is his heartbreak of the night.
"No," he answers at once and the words are cloaked in shame, "I have unfinished business here."
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Before Killing Was Cool ➊ FRERARD
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