Breaking Wild Hearts [3]

Chapter 15

Someone coughs and I open my eyes slowly. 

Alec. 

His eyes widen as he notices me staring at him. I pull the duvet closer to me as he whispers my name. 

"Are you okay?" he asks, standing up from the chair and walking towards me. 

I was in my old room. Dad's territory. 

"I am fine." I mumble. 

I'm healing you. Ava says to me quietly. The scars would stay there, a constant reminder of Cameron taking me again. 

"I wa-" Alec coughs again and I look at him confused. 

"Are you okay?" I ask him, as I pull myself up so I could sit on the bed. 

"I don't know," he answers honestly. "I think the curse is escalating." 

The curse. He was going to die if I didn't mark him. 

"You deserve to live." I smile at him softly. "You don't deserve this curse." I open my arms slowly as they protest in pain. 

I wanted him to hug me. 

Alec smiles at me as he sits on the bed and hugs me tightly. I hold in the scream as his hands rest against the wounds on my back. 

"It's been a week, Emily. I was so worried, I thought I lost you," he whispers to me as he buries his face in my neck and breathes me in. I ignore the sparks. "I felt this pain inside of me and I knew something was wrong. I'm sorry I was so late." 

"Do you trust me?" I ask softly. 

"Yes." He answers immediately. 

I pull away a little and before he can question what was happening I lean down towards his neck and mark him. 

"Fuck." Alec curses as my fangs dig deep into his neck. His hands tighten around me as I feel his blood dripping down slowly. 

It felt like an instinct to make sure he lived and he got the happiness he deserved. I pull away,and lick the wound closed gently. 

He stares at me with wide eyes as he pulls away. 

"Why?" He asks softly as he adjusts himself on the bed. 

"I don't want you to die." I answer him softly. "I'm not perfect like Anna," I was completely and utterly broken from inside. "I will never come in between you two but I could not watch you die knowing I could have stopped it."

"I broke up with Anna." He blurts out. 

It did not matter to me. Nothing mattered. 

"I ended it with her the day you left because I've been feeling something towards you. I didn't know what it was until the second I saw you wake up. All I could feel was relief that you had woken up." Alec says as he runs a hand through his hair. 

I don't say anything to him as he stares at me. 

"Why did you want to end it, Emily?" He asks softly as he reaches his hand out to hold mine. I feel the sparks as I stare at our joined hands. 

"I don't deserve this. I don't deserve this constant pain." I let out a sigh. "I am too broken for this world and I can not fix it." I tell him honestly. 

"You don't need to be fixed. You need to live," he smiles at me. 

I pull my hand away from him. "Nobody wants to be with a girl that has been raped and pretends that everything is fine." I whisper to myself. 

"I do." Alec says. 

I look at him. "No you don't."

"I do. I want to try, Emily. I really want to try with you. You have been here for everyone but I want to be here for you." He reaches out for my hand again and holds it tightly. 

I nod and mutter a quiet okay. 

"Shall I call your parents?" He asks standing up. 

"I just want to sleep." I reply back to him as I lay back down in the bed, praying I would disappear from the world. 

"Can I?" He points towards the other side of the bed and I nod my head as I stare up at the ceiling. I hear him climb into bed beside me. 

 "I think you deserve to live." He says quietly beside me.

I let out a soft sigh and stare up at the ceiling so I don't cry. "Don't I deserve happiness? What's the point of being alive if there is no reason to be happy?" I mutter and I feel him grab my hand. 

"I want to try with you. I'm not perfect, Emily and I'm not saying I am going to be perfect either. I don't know how to be a mate to someone. It's a big responsibility to be someone's soulmate but I want to try with you. Do you want to try with me?" He whispers the question.

 "No," I murmur and he looks up at me confused. 

"You don't?" 

 "No," I repeat and I see the hurt in his eyes clearly. "I don't want to try. I want to be me so I don't want to try. I like you, Alec and no matter much I try to ignore it, you hurt me. I wanted a soulmate just as much as anyone wants one. I saw you and I was happy. I was going to be okay. That's what soulmates do. Make each other okay. You didn't do it," I tell him gently and he looks devastated, "I tried really hard to push my feelings away. I knew you were with Anna and I knew I wasn't the type of person to go for someone else. I would wait for you. Forever if I had too, but I'm at a stage where I don't think I can wait or try anymore. I don't want anything from you." I pull my hand away from him. "I know I marked you but I don't hold you to any responsibility. I want you to live your life, Alec and I want to heal myself. I don't think I am ready to be with you. I can't give you what you want and I don't know if I would ever be ready for that." I wipe away the tears under my eyes and let out a deep breath. 

"I want you Emily. Every part of you, the broken, the healed and the shattered. I want you and I can wait forever for you. If that is what you want," He smiles at me and he holds my hand up and kisses it gently. 

"Go to sleep, you need to rest."

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Any Alec lovers?