It was almost a burst of fireworks inside me, near the abdomen area. It felt hot, but not in an unpleasant way, and it made my insides soft. I wasn't sure if it was a good thing, or a bad thing. All I could think of was that it felt nice enough for me to cancel out any negative thoughts about...I just stopped thinking about everything.
It felt...nice, actually. It was an odd feeling, the kind of warm comfort you get before burning yourself. It was almost as if I was waving my hand above a lone flame, feeling the heat brush the tender skin of my palm, like the tongue of a fire-breathing dragon. It was as if I was leaning against the hearth of the fireplace, out of the way of the flames and feeling the heat soak through the thin fabric of my cardigan as I pressed my back against the bricks.
Sometimes, it doesn't come that way. Sometimes, it is almost like a flash of lightning; so fast and brilliant that I didn't even notice it's entrance. It's powerful, like a fist colliding with my stomach, pushing out all the air, leaving me breatheless. It blinds me momentarily, leaving me scrambling around like a lost cat until I get my senses back. It's so pure and frightening; overwhelming and overcoming every will of mine in a second.
And sometimes, it comes after some cold storm, where you start to feel the cold recede and the warm tingling on your skin, like the sun burning your cells. It is not comfortable, but not entirely unpleasant. You look up to see the golden rays of the sun blocking out everything of your vision, and at that moment, everything is perfect.
Just beautifully perfect.
That, is called happiness.