Secret of Transforming Shyness

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The powerful secret of transforming your shyness is to take action by:

1. Creating Balance

2. Creating Safety

3. Consciously Breathing

Creating balance, creating safety and conscious breathing will allow you to transform the screaming inner voices saying:

"I'm too shy, I can't do this" into voices saying "I can handle this, I feel fear and I can do it."

The Secret of Transforming Shyness uncovers the power to handle any situation. Creating balance and safety prepares you for using the secret known since ancient times of using breath to control fear. This power is real and can be proven by you.

Creating Balance

Continue to work in an area where you are not stuck as determined by you in the Process of Understanding Shyness. Working in an area where you are not stuck provides balance to your life.  Balance leads to transformation.

Creating Safety

Safety means being able to be completely yourself without fear of judgment, criticism, or negative consequences. You have the power to create safety in your life. There are two kinds of safety you can create:  Internal and External.

Internal Safety

Internal safety means creating a safe place within ourselves in order to protect ourselves from self-criticism and self-judgment.  Internal safety can be created by recognizing that you are a unique human being entitled to learn by making mistakes. There are no standards to measure yourself by, no comparisons to other people to be made.  Internal safety means finding ways to be kind to yourself – no matter what.

External Safety

External safety means creating safe environments, situations, and resources in your life.  Safety can be found in clubs, classes, groups, friends, therapists – anywhere once you know what to look for.  Remember if it does not feel safe to you, then it is not safe.  You can ask yourself:  How can I be safe and do what I want to do? You know the answers so trust your inner guidance.

Safety Does Not Mean Playing It Safe!

Please note that safety does not mean "playing it safe." Safety means doing what it takes to make yourself feel safe enough to make the changes you want and to take that first step.

Use Repetition and Practice to Create Safety

Repetition and practice help create safety.  Would you give a music recital without practicing and being familiar with what you would perform?  Probably not yet we often expect ourselves to magically "perform" in a social situation without practice and experience.  It is important to realize that people who are confident are so because they have done the same thing successfully many times. You can "practice" by doing the things you want to do with people you do feel comfortable with.  If you would like to be comfortable at a particular place, go there often even if only for a short time and even if you feel uncomfortable (make it safe by allowing yourself to leave when it gets too uncomfortable.)  The more you go to a place, the more you will comfortable there.  There more you go out with people you are comfortable with; the easier it will be to go with someone new. The more repetition and practice you do, the more internal and external safety you will create.

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