"How's she doing, by the way?" Louis asked with a smug grin, patting my shoulder in appreciation of my recent good news, "How was the scan?"
"Went fine," I shrugged, though I smiled as the topic of my baby had sprung up so easily. I could talk about my child for hours on end. "The doctor said it looks like a boy, but it's only a guess."
"Aw, nice!" Liam grinned again, and Louis seemed pleased too, as he chuckled; "A little boy. I'd love one, to play football with and that, and have the banter. Someday, obviously..."
"I still have this gut feeling it's a girl," I said nonchalantly, "But either way, I'll be happy. As long as it comes out healthy."
"What are you talking about?"
The voice floated over from behind me, a few feet, and I swivelled on my heels. Josh was staring at me with furrowed brows, lips pressed together in a tight line. I wondered what had him looking so fucking pissed, but decided after a moment's deliberation that there was no harm in telling him my joyous news. He was part of the band, after all, he'd done a lot of gigs with us, travelled around. I could trust him, I was sure of it; if he told, he was only getting himself in deep water and losing his place in the band. He had no reason to blab.
"Oh, uh, you know Tamara?" I asked uncertainly, though my head told me vaguely that they'd met before at some point. Maybe after my birthday...yeah, that was it. The morning after. He nodded hesitantly, and I couldn't help the beam that broke out on my face as I revealed my well kept secret, "She's expecting. 13 weeks gone. The doctors guessed it's a boy, but it's too early to know for certain..."
"Shit," Josh exclaimed suddenly, and I was torn from my rambling. He looked shocked, his mouth dropped into an 'o' shape, eyes wide and wandering wildly through blank space.
"Oh, it's okay," I assured him happily, "Don't worry, we're keeping it. It's all fine, I couldn't be happier to be honest. It was a shock and that, but management know and they're fine with it. I just want it to be healthy and..."
"Uh, Harry," Josh breathed, shaking his head as he stared down at the floor strangely, "I have to tell you something. It's pretty important...oh God..."
I stared at him my eyes flickering back and forth in confusion. He looked a bit odd, like the colour had gone from his face. "Yeah, Josh, what is it?"
He looked up at me, eyes wide and...anxious? More than anxious, he looked terrified. I felt my stomach swirl with wonder and almost worry at his expression. Was there something wrong...?
"Boys!" I heard Paul calling from the front and my eyes were immediately aimed at him, "Soundcheck! Stop your gossiping and concentrate!"
I nodded at him, looking behind me once more only to see that Josh had retreated to behind his drumset, and wouldn't meet my eyes, or look anywhere at all for that matter other than straight at his drums. I shrugged it off easily, losing myself in my singing. He'd tell me some time or another, I decided.
It couldn't be that important.
* * *
I stepped off the tour bus to meet the roaring crowd, lifting my arm in an instinctual wave. I glanced up from my phone screen, beaming at the fans who'd come out to see us today at the venue.
It was Day 2 of the European Tour, and already I could tell that this was going to be a good four weeks, despite how much I missed home. Being in Europe was just so different - a breath of fresh air. The fans here were polite, and hearing girls calling my name in those exotic accents always put a smug smile on my face. The UK was great, obviously, and being in America was amazing, but there was just something about this continent that was so exciting, so new and inexperienced. There was so much beautiful scenery, and the weather was outstanding. It felt more like a holiday when we were in Europe; it felt like a release.