Fun With Fetishes

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          A fetish can be many things, but fetish play is the cornerstone of BDSM. A fetish is something that a person is turned on by and generally uses or sometimes even needs to reach sexual gratification or orgasm. These can be as simple as enjoying a specific type of roleplaying or as distant as a dependency on a certain kind of fetish play.

(I will go over in other chapters some of the major fetishes so keep an eye out for upcoming chapters about pet play, DDlg, and many more. This chapter is an overview, feel free to comment one or message me one that you want to see sooner rather than later and I'll be more than happy to prioritize or take the time out to highlight a specific area).

          If you look deep enough into any persons sexual fantasies there is always a fetish of some kind. There are probably some known ones, like bondage, foot, heels, rape, etc. and some less known ones like pet play, DDlg, and 'sports' (no that's not what you think it is and I don't suggest that you google it, yet.)

           Fetishes just like anything else in BDSM must be practiced safely and with consent (the person or persons must be able to consent in the first place as well). A very important aspect of the BDSM community (the many people that partake in BDSM practices), that people are not made to feel ashamed for their fantasies. It is normal, healthy, and acceptable to have fantasies. It is also normal, healthy, and acceptable to play out these fantasies in a controlled environment safely and with consent. As mentioned before the backbone to BDSM is the policy of "safe, sane, and consensual."
          
            People in the community will not and shall not be made to feel bad or banished because of their desires, we all have them, the only way to be outcast from the community is through your actions. Everyone has a kink and it is not anyone's place to tell them that theirs is unacceptable. This policy is not always as respected as it should be, but people that understand BDSM (not just the ones who read fifty shades of grey) and people who have been in the community for longer periods of time are more likely to follow this rule. Understanding, acceptance, and compassion are things that are developed over time and with experience.

The BDSM community is based heavily on mutual trust and respect. Each person must trust the other in the community with the secrets that they tell them. Most people would not appreciate word getting out of their deviant sexual behavior, and for some it could be rather detrimental to their friendships and even careers. It is assumed that what is said to another person in the community shall not and will not be repeated to the random public or associates of that person. If you cannot follow the rules of consent and safety, you are not considered part of the community, you are considered fake, an abuser, someone who is looking to take advantage of people, or even a sex offender or predator (of course this all depends on their actions).

BDSM is about everyone being able to fulfill their fantasies and getting what they want sexually or emotionally, and that goes for any person playing any role in the community. It is not about taking advantage of a person, it is about giving them what they want. That is why you must be able to trust the person(s) that you are participating with. If there is no trust between the two people, then it is not safe or sane behavior. That is why the community does not recommend participating in BDSM activities with strangers, especially ones that you met while intoxicated, it is however respected as each individual's choice.

          Fetishes can develop in a person for many different reasons. Including but not limited to associating a certain thing with sexual gratification (think of it as habit making), it fulfilling an aspect of their life that they missed out on or don't feel satisfied in (being a Dom because it gives them the control that they don't get in the real world), etc. The reasons a person develops a fetish tends to be more specific to the fetish itself and will be covered chapter by chapter.

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⏰ Last updated: Aug 31, 2016 ⏰

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