Chapter 45

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I continued to stay quiet throughout the rest of the dinner. My frustrations had been numbed when I had vented everything to Hoseok, and I could breathe calmly for the time being.

When the night was over, I said my goodbyes to Jungkook and Taehyung and their families. I hugged Mr. and Mrs. Park and thanked them again for having me over. They thanked me for showing up for which in return, I laughed.

Jimin and I walked home together, space in between us, no words shared the entire time. I didn't have anything to say yet I wanted to scream thousands of more words, the same words repeated in different ways.

When we arrived, I let both of us inside and we made our way up to my bedroom. Jimin grabbed his pajamas and went to change in the bathroom. While he was in there, I gathered my own pajamas along with an outfit and stuffed it into a bag. Jimin walked back in when I was zipping it up and gave me a questionable look.

"Uh, I'm going to Hoseok's." I hoped he hadn't taken it as an invitation, because I needed to talk about him without him being around. Jimin didn't say anything. He just nodded once and broken eye contact with me before plopping himself onto my bed. I sighed, not sure of how I felt about leaving him alone. I didn't want to. But, I did at the same time. I was conflicted, and I was conflicted because of him. I just needed a night away to think over things and to talk it out. I pulled my bag over my shoulder and left my house, a lunge of guilt eating away at me in the back of my mind.

I just hoped I hadn't hurt his feelings or anything.

I took my phone out of my back pocket and dialed Hoseok. He picked up moments afterward.

"On your way?" He asked. I nodded, then realized he couldn't see me.

"Yeah. I should be there in no less than 10 minutes if I keep up the pace."

"Alright, well, I've got a nice comfy floor bed set up for you, and I have food-"

"No thank you, I've lost my appetite."

"Who said the food was for you?" I laughed.

"Of course, how inconsiderate of me."

"Are you feeling okay?" Hoseok suddenly asked in a serious tone.

"We can talk about it when I get there."


"I'm just glad."

"Why's that?"

"You don't think I'm psycho."

"Of course not. Why would you lie about something like that?"

"I mean, if I was psycho-"

"But you're not."

"I know. God I hate that word."

"And you've never told me why."

"I don't know why myself." I shrugged and sighed, the word repeating in my mind. Psycho. "Anyways, thank you."

"Of course, you know I've always got your back."

"Well I'll see you in a few."

"Okay, seeya. The door is open."

And with that we hung up. Minutes later I arrived at his house and let myself inside, locking the door behind me. The lights were all off and I almost tripped up the stairs on the way to Hoseok's room. He must've hear it because I heard his obnoxious laughter echoing through the halls.

"I hate you." I groaned and went into the bathroom near his bedroom, changing into my pajamas before bursting into an alarmed Hoseok's bedroom. He had jumped back and hit his head on the wall. I couldn't stop myself from laughing then. "Yours such an idiot."

"And I'm reminded everyday. But we're not here to talk about me. We are here to talk about you."

"What are you, my therapist?" I replied and sat down on the makeshift bed made of pillows and blankets.

"For tonight, call me Doctor Hoseok."

"No way in hell."



"So, you're definitely sure you're in love with Jimin?"


"Damn, so there's no way in hell I'd be able to tap that ass?"

"Hoseok!" I frowned and hit his arm. Fucking unbelievable.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm childish okay-"


"Does he have a time limit?"

"Just until I say I love him or until the poison beats me to it."

"And how long until the poison beats you to it?"

"Who knows?"

"Ah. That sucks..."

"What do you think I should do? Because I told him I wouldn't say it. But is that really what's best?"

"I think that you should do whatever you feel is best."

"Fuck you, you're the worst therapist ever."

"Hey, don't get hostile with me! I'm just giving it to you like it is! I can't decide for you." I sighed.

"Yeah... I know. I just wish I didn't have to make this decision."

"Well it's a hard ass decision to make, I can only imagine."

"I guess so."

"But really, who would've thought you'd fall for Park Jimin of all people."

"I know, I never saw it coming."

"I'd expect you to end up with someone the complete opposite of you, kind of like me, but not me, you feel?"

"Yeah, I understand."

"Yoongi, no matter what happens, don't do anything stupid."

"I wouldn't."

"You would."

"I wouldn't."

"Yoongi... I still remember what you did when Yerin, you know."

"It's different this time with Jimin."

"Actually, the situations are quite the same. Comas, both of them."

"And just like Yerin, Jimin isn't going to wake up either." I bit down on my lip and immediately tried to take my mind off of it.
"Can we talk about it more later, I think I've had enough for now."

"Of course." Hoseok pat my shoulder.

"So, how is it going with your sister's boyfriend?"

"Just fantastic actually."

"Do you know his name yet?"

"To be honest, no, but I think it begins with a B maybe."

"Hoseok..." I shook my head in disappointment.


Rip @ my brotp feels

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