INTRICATE - Brian Quinn.

16

Waking up, I still felt an insane amount of guilt about how I had reacted to Q's honesty last night. The one thing that I had always wanted from him and always tried to get was his total honesty, there rarely was such a time where he would open up to anybody. I replayed the conversation ten times over in my head, and each time I could never convince myself that I was right. Maybe I was about us both being in relationships, but ignoring the truth that was Q and I's inner feelings was probably the worst option I could have gone for, because the thoughts were now eating me alive.

As I walked into James' room he was already sat up waiting for me to come and pick him up. I noticed his eyes especially this morning, the exact copy of his fathers. There was no way that I would ever begin to get over Brian when every part of James was a reminder of him and what we once had. I had to find Brian and tell him that he was right. Right about everything. Hell I didn't have any feeling of love or admiration for Tyler, just like he didn't for Nicole. As selfish as it was, as soon as Q was around, I couldn't think past him and myself. It felt like it was always just only the two of us in the moment.

I had decided to go to my parents house to drop James off whilst I went to Brian's hotel to talk to him. Walking up the hotel corridor - the same walk we had done a few nights prior - the nervousness started to erupt in the pit of my stomach. I had no plans on what I was going to say, I just needed to be as honest as he was last night and lay everything out and into the open.

Knocking on his door, the moments in between him opening the door felt like hours instead of mere seconds.

"Jess?" Brian questioned, seeming more than shocked at my presence.

"Hey" I smiled warmly, trying to show that I had no animosity towards him and that this unannounced visit was that of a good natured one.

"W-what are you doing here?"

"What do do you mean what am I doing here?" I laughed slightly. "I came to see you. Can I come in?"

"I was just, I-" his nervous stammering was soon cut off by a girl wearing nothing but his T-shirt exit the bathroom behind him.

"You were just busy, I get it" I said, before storming off. It was literally like this guy enjoyed playing with my feelings. I wasn't wrong in knowing that he would ignite my feelings, to either mess it up by thinking with his dick, or having to leave to go back to New York. I was stupid to think that even for a second that I could possibly salvage any of this.

"Jess, it's not what it looks like" Q yelled as he made a chase after me.

"How is that not exactly what it looks like?" I said as I turned around to face him, not believing that he actually had the cheek to try and tell me that this 'wasn't what I looks like'.

"Okay, it is what it looks like. But that doesn't make anything that I told you last night not true anymore."

"You went and got a girl probably an hour after you told me that, Brian. So sorry if your stories don't all add up right now"

"Are you fucking kidding me right now?"

"Me?"

"Yes, you. You literally fucking told me to leave, that there was nothing here for me, yet you show up to my hotel the next day and get pissed that another girl is there. Make up your damn mind Jess"

"I came because I wanted to tell you to stay.. And that you were right."

"I knew I was right. I knew that you knew that too. That's not new information here, especially when you're going to change your mind in about....ten minutes" he said, looking down at his watch. "You can't pick and choose forever, I've been waiting since day one for you to just say go."