Should I stay or go?

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Alex's P.O.V.

It's been a month since the whole thing with chris and bree and all that stuff. I hated her for what she did to chris. Chris is so amazing and so faithful. How could you be so heartless to do that?! I wanted to beat her till the end. I know that sounds mean, but she was a real bitch. I haven't cut since chris and me started dating. We spent everyday together and I loved it. Motionless in white are going on tour for 2 month's and I don't know what to do. Chris want's me to come with them, but I don't think I should.

They are rockstar's, I don't want to bug them on the tour. I don't think I'm going, but I don't wanna leave chris. I need to talk to ryan and see what he says. It's 8:45 a.m. and I have work today. So it will be easy to ask ryan what to do. I got my thing's and went to my car getting in and starting it. I got to hot topic and put my thing's in the back heading out to see what ryan was doing. "Hey Ryan" I said walking up to him and seeing what he was up to. "Hey baby. What's up?" yeah he still calls me that. Chris hates it, but he know's me and ryan are nothing. "Nothing, but I do have a question for you' I said looking at him and seeing him turn his head to me.

"What's your question?". "Well motionless in white are leaving for tour in two week's and chris asked me to come with them." Ryan looked at me with hurt in his eyes. What is that all about? "Well if you want to go you should go, but you'll have to talk to max if you can get off work for...how long?" I was confused at why he looked so hurt by what I said. "Um...two month's" ryan turned away not facing me. "Well go ask max if you can go, I have to get back to work." I hated seeing him like this, but why would he be hurt by this? Does he not want me to leave?

I walked to the back looking for max. He was getting some shirts off the shelf. "Hey max can I talk to you about something?" He turned so he was looking at me. "Yeah, what's up alex?". "Well motionless in white are leaving for tour in two week's for two month's, and I was wonder if I could get off work to go with them?". Max gave me a sad smile and opened his mouth. "Alex I can't do that, I'm sorry. I mean that's amazing to go on tour with them, but I can't give you that long off. If you go I'm sorry to say this, but I will have to fire you." I don't want to get fired and stop working here. I love it here.

What the hell do I do? "You can tell me what you decide later okay." Max walked out to the front with the shirt's in his hand's? I don't know if I should stay or go. I went back to the front and started work. Work was slow and my mind was in a whole different place. I have no idea what I'm going to do. I'm hanging out with chris after I'm done with work and I don't know what to tell him. 

Work was over and chris came in looking for me. I went up to him and hugged him tight. "Hey babe. Is everything okay?" Chris said looking down at me. "Yeah, let me just get my thing's okay". I gave him a quick kiss and started headed to the back. I got my thing's and walked to the front were I saw chris giving autograph's to his fan's. I loved how he was with them. He was so amazing and he cared and loved all of them so much. I went up to him and smiled. He smiled back at me and the fan's said thank you and left. "Your so amazing. You know that right?" I said smiling at him while he took my hand in his. 

I looked over and saw ryan looking at us with pain and sadness in his eyes. I don't know what's up with him. He's been acting weird ever since I told him chris asked me to be his girlfriend. I need to talk to ryan about that later. Chris lead me to my car and we got in. "So my house or your's?" I said looking at chris and starting my car up. "How about yours?" he said with a grin on his face. I giggled at how cute he is and headed to my house. I parked in the drive way and we got out going to the front door of my small house. I unlocked the door going in and putting my things down heading to the kitchen. 

"Want anything to drink or eat babe?" I asked chris looking in the fridge to see what I have. I felt chris put his arm's around my waist and pull me close to his body. He started kissing down my neck, making me moan to how amazing it felt. I felt him smile at how I had just moaned because of him. I turned so I was facing his chest and put my arm's around his neck pulling him to kiss me. Everytime I kissed chris nothing else mattered. It was so full with love and care. I loved how I knew he felt the same. Chris pulled my closer making the kiss even deeper. 

"I love you so much alex" Chris spoke against my lip's. My heart almost jumped out of my chest and I start blushing and pulled away. That was the first time chris told me he loved me and I knew he meant it. I felt something with him I never felt with someone else. He showed me how to love and how it feel's. I smiled at him and kissed him again. " I love you too chris." He pulled me up the stairs and opened the door to my bedroom closing it behind him. He pushed me against the wall crashing our lip's together. He moved his hand's down to my waist and started pulling on the bottom of my shirt. He broke the kiss and took my shirt off throwing it on the floor. I grabbed his shirt pulling it off his body. I looked at him and stared a this sexy body. 

"Like what you see baby?" Chris said seeing that I was staring at him. I blushed from embarrassment. He kissed down my neck picking me up and putting me on the bed. He got on top of me kissing me down my chest. He unclipped my bar and slid it off my body putting it on the floor. I hated my body so much. I didn't want him to see it, but I trusted him. He took one my breast in his mouth. I moaned at the feeling he was giving me. He did the same to the other one. He moved down to my jean's and unbuttoned them. He started pulling them down and next thing I know he stops. I look at him and I finally see why he stopped. I saw all my scar's on my thigh's from when I cut. They covered my thigh's with scar's

Chris looked up at me with sadness, and worry in his eyes. "Alex, why?" Chris said with his voice cracking a little bit. "They are nothing chris don't worry, okay" I said not wanting to look at him. He got off the bed and stood up. He was going to leave me, wasn't he. He started walking around the room with his hand in his head. I pulled up my jean's and picked up chris's shirt. "Alex why would you cut yourself?" he spoke with pain in his voice. I looked at him and saw tear's in his eye's. "Chris I hate myself so much and I didn't want to live that's why, but I haven't done it since you asked me to be your girlfriend. You help me not to. You make me feel happy and that there is a reason to live. I'm so sorry" I said looking at the ground with tears running down my face. "Hey. Look at me baby. I'm not mad. It just hurt's to see the love of my life hurting herself like that." My heart skipped a beat by what he said. I'm the love of his life? 

I looked up at him. He had a sad smile on his face. "I love you no matter what okay. Just please baby don't hurt yourself again. I couldn't live with myself if something were to happen to you". "I stopped chris because of you I stopped. You gave me a season to live." I blushed at how he made me feel. He grabbed my hand pulling me to him. "I love you alex so much it hurt's." I giggled and put my head on his chest. "I love you to chris." He lifted up my head and kissed me with so much more meaning and power this time. I couldn't ask for anything better than him. I think I might go on tour with him. I need him by my side. I looked up at him and he smiled at me. 

"Let's go to bed" he said taking off his jean's, leaving him in just his boxer's. I looked at him, staring at his body. Damn how could he be anymore perfect? "Hey stop staring at me" he laughed at me. "Sorry your just so sexy it's hard not to" I blushed looking at my hand's. He laughed "What about you? I could stare at you forever. Your the most beautiful woman in the world". "No I'm not." "Oh fuck yes you are". Picked me up and put me on the bed. He took my jean's off and threw them on the floor. "Your even more sexy with just my shirt on" I giggled and buried my face in the pillow. I felt chris get in bed with me. He pulled me to him and kissed my head. 

I put my head on his chest and kissed him. "I love you so much alex, goodnight" He kissed me on the lips with so much love. "I love you too chris goodnight baby" I kissed his bare chest. He played with my hair as I fell asleep listening to his heart beat. I was so lucky to have him. I'm in love with chris motionless.

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Hope you liked. Will alex end up going with them or staying home alone? .o. Find out in the next update. Bye<3 Vote and comment;p awww chris<3 stop being so cute

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