n i n e

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"Earth to kehlani, are you there?" I blinked my eye a few times looking over at Jhene.

"Yeah?" What's up?" I said crossing my legs on the couch.

"Nothing babes you were just zoned out, whatcha thinking about?" She said playing with the ends of my hair. I was thinking about cutting it short I don't know yet.

"Nothing," I said with a shrug, she had a look on her face showing that she didn't believe me but I didn't have anything to hide.

"I'm hungry, imma get some chips. You want anything?" I asked but she shook her head.

I got up from the couch and went into the kitchen looking for some hot cheetos. She followed closely sitting on the counter watching me carefully.

I look up to meet her gaze, I tilt my head slightly in confusion.

"Do you like Kevin?" She asked quickly and quite aggressively. I grabbed the chips and walked out the kitchen not answering her.

"Kehlani do you like Kevin?" She asked again. I stopped right infront of my front door which was right besides my living room, I turned around and faced her.

"Why does it matter?"

"I just wanna know. I see the way you look at him, you like him don't you? You want to date him, don't you? Don't you?"

I could feel the anger boiling inside of me, why does she care if I like him or not, it's not her business.

"No, I don't like him Jhene so leave me alone! It's just a stupid bet and a stupid plan. I just need him to like me then I break his heart like you said. I'm not catching feelings for him and never will so hop off." I yell, I needed time to clear my mind and calm down.

I turn toward the door and open it, revealing a very sad Kevin, but his sadness quickly turned into anger. I knew I fucked up big time.

"I thought you actually liked me kehlani, I should've remembered that this was still a bet, you never really liked me. You just did this so you could break my heart and leave? You promised you wouldn't do that to me, you lied."  He looked at me in disgust and shook his head.

He threw the box of chocolates and flowers down at my feet and crumbled up a note and threw that too. I tried to speak but he cut me off.

"I don't want to hear your excuses, just...just leave me alone and I mean it this time don't talk to me. You got what you wanted lani, you broke my heart and I lost the bet."

He turned and started to walk away with his head down, he didn't even look back.

"I'll just go." Jhene said, I looked at her, she had guilty look on her face. I moved out the way and let her leave without saying goodbye.

I picked up the chocolates, flowers and the nite closing the door behind me. I go up to my room placing everything on the dresser except the note and go to sit on the edge of my bed.

I unfolded the crumpled paper and began to read:

I usually don't write things like this so please bear with me.

I know it's only been a few months since we started talking but I feel like you actually understand me and you never judged or left me and I thank you for that.

Even when I got mad at you and held you tight, I'm truly sorry for that I never meant to put my hands on you, even if I didn't hurt you badly that was still wrong of me.

I love your eyes, they're dark brown but  if you stare into them long enough you feel a warmness surround you. You just get drawn in.

You're laugh, it's like music to my ears. If I could I would tell you jokes and do silly things just to hear it on repeat.

You're smile, don't even get me started on your smile. It always makes me happy to see you happy. That's all I want for you, pure happiness and I want to provide that for you. I want to see that beautiful smile on your face everyday.

Your lips, I could kiss them all day if you'd let me, I'd never stop.

Your hugs, they always help me calm down if I'm having a bad day. It's like when ever my arms snake around your waist and your head is laying on my chest everything else seems to fade away.

Your personality, God damn it lani your personality is so beautiful. I messed with a lot of girls but you pushed that aside and still continued to talk to me, not many people would do that. I don't know I just like you a lot.

I didn't realize I was crying until I felt the paper beginning to get damp. I wiped away my tear and folded the note back neatly and placed it on my night stand.

Why did I even agree to do this?

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