It Goes There // Josh Dun + Twenty One Pilots

thirteen // this place is so pathetic

"Uh, I didn't think you would be back so soon," he muttered. "I thought I would have time to re-bandage them before you saw."

My eyes drifted to the roll of gauze that he must have pulled out of his bag for this very reason. "Oh, Garrett, what have you done?" I slowly made my way over to sit beside him, gently grabbing his right arm. He yelped out in pain before quickly grabbing his hoodie to muffle the sound. "Oh, sweetheart."

He shook his head, yelping once again in his hoodie as I examined his left arm as well. It was littered with scars from previously self-harm along with fresh cuts that had to be made today. Garrett refused to show me his face and I knew it was because he was crying.

I gently guided the hoodie away from his face, my right hand stroking his cheek as silent tears ran down his face. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "I was feeling really bad today and I hadn't hurt myself for weeks and I don't know what came over me."

I looked down at his arms, my hand still pressed against his damp cheek. "Garrett, it's okay. Everything will be fine. Now, let's wrap your arms up."

He and I stayed as quiet as possible as I wrapped the gauze around both of his arms. I watched him bite down on his lip to keep from crying out. Once I was finished, my hands cupped his face as I kissed his nose. "I'll be back in a second. Just lay down and rest until I come back."

Garrett nodded, cringing as he pulled his hoodie back over his frame. I slid out of my room without saying another word and slowly made my way down the hallway that was cloaked in darkness. My parents' bedroom door was shut and everything was quiet aside from the voices of the twins that carried down from the attic.

Denahi's bedroom door was right across from Caspian's and I was truly thankful that he didn't have Micah's room, which was right next to Mom and Dad's. I turned his door handle, knowing that if I knocked, he wouldn't get out of bed to answer.

The lamp on his desk was still lit up and I was surprised to him dressed in the same clothes he wore today. Next to him was an open French textbook, signaling that he had fallen asleep while studying.

"Hey, Denahi," I whispered, shaking his foot. "Wake up and don't you dare pretend that you don't hear me right now."

My older brother groaned, rolling over onto his side. "I'm not kidding, Denahi. It's important."

"What is so important that you felt the need to wake me up at two in the morning?" He mumbled. "It better be good."

I crossed my arms. "We need to go to the hospital."

The dark-haired boy sat bolt upright, confusion on his face. "What did the twins do this time? How badly are they hurt?"

Garrett could drive himself to the hospital in his Camaro, but he was in no state right now to do anything. I would drive him, but I wasn't the best driver at night. That left Denahi as our only option, not counting Christian, who would probably run and tell Mom and Dad that Garrett was in my room.

"It's not the twins, Denahi," I explained. "It's Garrett."

My brother raised his eyebrows. "Wait, your boyfriend is in your room right now? You know Mom and Dad don't like him."

I ran a hand through my messy hair. "Denahi, please just drive us to the hospital. Garrett relapsed and he needs stitches badly."

My brother stood up, walking over to his desk to grab his shoes. "Fine, let's go, but we have to be very quiet because if not, we are all dead."

•••

Garrett put up a fight about going to the hospital until I threatened to tell his mother about his self-harm once again. He quickly shut up and surprisingly let Denahi drive his car. The moment we all climbed into his Camaro, Blink-182's What's My Age Again started blaring through the speakers. I was honestly surprised that Nirvana wasn't playing.

Garrett leaned against me and I wrapped my arm around his figure as Denahi pulled out of the driveway. Caspian caught all of us sneaking down the stairs, but he just rolled his eyes and said he didn't want to know anything about what we were doing. He went straight back up to bed and I hoped that he wouldn't wake our parents up by accident.

"I'm so tired," Garrett mumbled against my shoulder. I stroked his hair, trying to provide him some kind of comfort. "I know, baby, I know. Hopefully, you can fall asleep after we leave the hospital."

We all stayed silent the rest of the ride, the only noise being the music coming out of the radio. Panic At the Disco was the last artist that came on before we entered the hospital parking lot. Much to my amazement, it was Build God, Then We'll Talk Live in Denver.

Aiden never understood the crazy obsession that I had with Ryan Ross. I loved every member of the band, former and current, but Ryan, to me, was very special. He was more talented than Brendon Urie singing wise, in my opinion. I could remember crying my eyes out when him and Jon Walker left Panic and then being thankfully that I got to see Panic in the concert with the original lineup when I was fourteen.

Garrett also asked me one time that if I could date either him or Ryan Ross, who would I pick? I loved my boyfriend to death, but I wouldn't pass up the chance to date Ryan. Of course, it wasn't ever going to because I was a hardcore Ryden shipper. It was real and everyone knew it.

Denahi switched off the engine, motioning for us to get out of the backseat, I climbed out first, Garrett following after me. I watched as he carefully made sure to not hit his arms on anything.

The car automatically locked once the doors were all shut and we walked towards the ER entrance. Garrett seemed quite uneasy and I understood that he hated hospitals, but the cuts refused to stop bleeding without stitches. I smiled a reassuring smile at him as we stepped through the door.

The ER seemed dead with only one nurse at the desk. She smiled at us as she looked up. "How can I help you?"

"Um," I said, gesturing to a very uncomfortable looking Garrett, "my boyfriend needs stitches in his arms."

The nurse stood up, handing Garrett and I a clipboard with information that needed to be filled.

"Do you want me to fill everything out?" I offered. "Do your arms hurt really bad?"

He nodded. "You know all my information, but my social security number, so I'll fill that in after you are done."

We settled down into a set of plastic chairs while the nurse hurried down s hallway, probably to get a doctor. I was able to fill out the paperwork quickly before passing it off to Garrett, who kept his hood pulled over his black hair. He wrote down his social security number before standing up to put it back on the desk.

Five minutes later, the nurse came back to usher Garrett back to meet the doctor.

"Will you come back with me, Chicago?" He pleaded. "Please."

I glanced at Denahi. "Go on," he said, nodding. "I'll wait."

"Thank you," I whispered before gently grabbing my boyfriend's hand.

"It's going to be okay, Garrett, I promise."

A/N: I am literally so tired; however, I'm seeing Melanie Martinez next Saturday.

-L.A