Letters to Her

Prologue

Shot after shot after shot.

Tonight was another one of those nights, where all I can think about is you.  Those nights come very often but tonight was different. I can't stop thinking about you. You just wouldn't leave my mind. Your beautiful face and body was stuck in my brain; and every person I looked at had your face. They had your cute freckles, had your beautiful smile, and they also had those eyes. Those beautiful brown eyes. Your eyes were intense, and the most memorizing eyes I've ever seen. When I look into your eyes, it's like my heart melts. When I look into your eyes, I always get lost in them.

Feeling a tear roll down my cheek, I quickly wiped it before anyone saw me. Come on Chris. Get it together.  You can't be crying over some girl.

Sometimes, I feel like you're just another female and I shouldn't be crying for you. But deep inside I know you're so much more. You're a beautiful, smart girl. No scratch that. Woman. You're so generous and sweet and goofy. You have so much talent and everyone loves you. You're known for so much but to me, you're also the woman I fell so deeply in love with; and also the women who took my heart and right after stepped on it breaking it into a million pieces.

Holding the only thing I had left of you, I stared at it intensely, as I began to reminisce about the day i captured this moment. You were so happy and you loved me back then. You were just turning 23 when we went to the Bahamas. You so peaceful when we were there and you didn't care anything; and you were in love. In love with me. Well at least I thought you were. Maybe you were just using me because you felt lonely. Right now I didn't care, because I just wanted to be with you. I'll do anything, and I mean anything, to be with you. I love you more than I love myself.

Taking out my iPhone 5, I unlocked it by sliding my thumb across the bottom of the screen. Going to my contacts, I went straight to your name.

I needed to talk to you.

After three rings, it hung up. I know you were ignoring me but I didn't care so I decided to send you a text message.

I needed you right now.

~ babe, please i want you back. I need you 9:45

~  I'll do better 9:47

~ I promise. 9:48

~ what did i do to make you not love me anymore? 9:55

~ I thought I was the one. The one you could come to when you needed someone to hold, the one you could come to when you needed to rant about your day. The one that made you laugh, blush and smile. 10:00

~ What happened? 10:02

~ I love you 10:05

Knowing you wouldn't text back, I gave up. I grabbed my jacket before walking out of the bar. Getting in to my car I zoomed off onto the road. You didn't live very far from where I was, but I did take a while to get there. Especially on a night like this, where I was drunk off my ass..

As rain began to pour down heavily, I sighed. It started to get a little gloomy . Ironic because the weather is how I feel.

After a few minutes, I was finally there. After all that rain and people speeding around me I'm shocked I made it here.

Walking up to the door, I wet my lips, nervously. I knew she was here since her car was parked in her driveway.

Balling up my fist, I raised my arm and before I could even knock

There she was. Standing right in front of me. The look on her face showed she was shocked and also a little angry.

"Babe-"

"I'm not your babe." She says, slamming the door in my face.

"What did I do so wrong?" I cried. "What did I do to make you hate me so much? Did I not do enough for you?"

No answer.

It hurt that you were so angry at me, you wouldn't even say a word to me.

"Whatever I did, I'm sorry!"

"I'm standing out here in the rain with soaked clothes for you! and I just want you to tell me what I did. I'm sorry. I just want you back."

As I began to grow tired of holding it all in, I began to sob letting down it all out. I could keep it in anymore. I loved this girl and out of nowhere she's tells me she doesn't love me anymore.  We've been together for years and she just threw that all away.

"Please." I whispered. Opening the door, she walked towards me before turning around locking the door. Slightly pushing me, she walked past me going to her car as I began to follow.

"Nina please." I said, following her to her car.

"Leave me alone, Chris."

"Just give me another chance, whatever I did I'm sorry and i won't do it again. Just please give me another chance. I love you."

She slammed her car door, and started it. And as soon as she pulled off, I began to chase after her.

"BABE, PLEASE!" I yelled, loosing her.

It's hard knowing that someone you love deeply doesn't ant you back. I don't know what I did wrong but whatever it is I won't do t again, or I'll do better. I just want my baby back. Nina was my life, and I just won't let go.

I can't let go...

I love her too much.

And I needed some way to talk to her, other than popping up at her house and blowing up her phone.

So I grabbed a piece of notebook paper a pen,

and began writing..

my letters to her...

______________

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~ Princess❤️