RMYG: Chapter 30

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Remember Me…Your Girlfriend?

Chapter Thirty

The car ride is mostly quiet except for the silent music playing in the background. Occasionally I would unwillingly throw quick glances at Jason to guess his mood.

Dammit, what is he thinking? What the hell was that on the rink?

Am I going insane or did Jason really utter those surreal words? Well, surreal in his case anyway.

Be mine, Vanessa.

He had waited for my answer, looking at me expectantly and maybe, just maybe a little hopeful but that could have been wishful thinking on my part.

All I really know is that my heart had been beating frantically with every second his eyes bore into mine. His eyes looked almost black and determined in the lighting of the rink but strangely honest all the same.

Oh god, I think I’m really going insane.

It almost broke my heart when I saw his expression change after he realised I wasn’t going to answer. He dropped his eyes for a second and said, “Let me take you home.” he offered, removing his hands from my face to get up.

I still couldn’t answer, instead I had helplessly watched him stand and hold out his hands towards me. Letting him help me up, wondering why he didn’t demand me to answer his question. He didn’t care? Or he couldn’t bring himself because he felt uncomfortable by this topic as he had confessed right before he kissed me.

“But my dad…” I said weakly.

“Your dad already knows I’m taking you home.”

His tone had sounded so painfully distant to me. He and I where finally getting somewhere these last few weeks and now, just because I was too chicken to answer, I might have ruined my only chance at getting Jason to trust me a little more.

I had followed him out of the rink without a word. Jason waited patiently as I removed my skates and slipped into my boots before returning them and bidding everyone a goodbye. He even walked a few steps ahead of me to the car, not looking back once to even check if I was still following, which I guess he knew I was without looking. But I didn’t blame him in the least.

He had asked me something serious, something really important that changes everything and I was being such a coward. I almost broke down crying then.

I hopelessly watch buildings flying by my window, but mostly watching his reflection on the glass, aching to say something to Jason just to break this silence. But what? I’m sorry?

I just can’t believe Jason’s words for some strange reason. They were just too alien. Jason having feelings for me? I never knew Jason actually had any feelings for a girl, yet alone me. Vanessa Pierce, whose had sooo much luck with her love life so far and can’t get her head out of her ass to assure her own happiness by taking care of others.

“I…”

My eyes immediately went from his reflection to the real Jason sitting next to me on the drivers’ seat the minute he started speaking, like a desparet idiot looking for his attention, which I was.

“…I was being serious back there.” He glanced my way, our gazes locked for a heartbeat of a second before he had to concentrate on the rode again.

I restrained myself from taking a deep breath because I just know it will sound really shaky at his words.

“I know.” Did I? Partly yes, but mostly I still just didn’t want to believe it. Actually it wasn’t like I didn’t want to believe it, I just couldn’t. Probably because I just haven’t healed from Matthew’s mistakes yet. I couldn’t trust Jason’s words.

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