Today was both, a treasured and horrifying day. Cameron and I decided not to do anything because it brings back memories, some good and some bad. It's almost been a year since Jacob cheated on me and he is still trying to convince me that the fan made a move on him instead of the other way around. I could see it in his eyes that he still loves me, but he screwed up big time and we are now only friends like before. The funny thing is that I moved oh but he couldn't at all. Sometimes I second guess my decisions that I made after that day, and other times I couldn't care less. But that's not important at the moment, today's the day I found out that my parents attempted murdering me; their own child who cherished them until this day. I try not to but I guess somethings are hard to let go. Today's the day Cameron adopted me and did everything my parents couldn't do; he changed his whole life for me. But I'm still on the road of replacing that missing part in my heart with his love. He is my real dad in my opinion. I'm dedicating this whole day to teaching that part of me that is still holding on to let go. I stopped with the self-harm after my birthday because Cameron would always check my wrists and he'd frown at them if there was a new one. He'd then hug me and tell me the same thing every time but it still had an effect on me,"If I gave you a blade and told you that I wanted to match with you, would you do it?Would you cut my wrist in the same ways that you did to yours?" I'd always shake my head and see the point he is making, but there was always an extra part to his sentences before he left. The last time I cut, he told me,"And you're not a monster, remember the reason why you do that is because it's your only escape from a monster's and I'm sorry if I'm that monster." He eventually did learn not to blame himself for my doings with the help of me, it was the only thing I could do. I checked the time before getting up and changing out of my pajamas. I quickly changed into a yellow skater dress that showed a little of my back, some black high top converse, and of course the bracelet Cameron have me. I now have that painted on my bedroom wall in big letters, 'God has a Plan'. Did I mention I'm dating Hunter? I'm usually the one who wakes up Cameron but I decided to make our favorite pancakes first. When the pancakes were done and I was setting the table, I heard footsteps down the stairs and looked up to see a sleepy shirtless Cameron. It's like he is against sleeping with a shirt because he glares at me whenever I try to convince him to. He walked up to me and kissed my forehead before sitting down and said,"Hey beautiful". I sat down across from him as he devoured his pancakes and then went to change. Even though I was dating Hunter, I had a little tinsy winsy crush on Jack G. But he is like about to turn 16 and I'm about to turn 13.
(A/N: Let's pretend he is because she looks more like Madison Beer and they are my OTP. Okay? Okay.)
The door rung snapping me out of my thoughts, and I opened it to be face to face with Jacob. I stepped aside for him to come in but he just stood there staring me up and down. Here he goes again followed by his speech about how sorry he is. This time I actually stood there and was gonna listen, but he was cut off by Hunter walking in. My face lit up and I ran up to him with his arms open wide. We were hugging for a while until we pulled apart when I heard a camera shutter go off. Cameron started to laugh and obviously took a picture of us. "Oh look who's wearing a shirt now", I said in a sarcastic voice. He changed into a black v-neck shirt, black and white checkered slip-on shoes, white shorts, and he had his RayBans on. I turned my head to Jacob who now had an annoyed/ pissed off look on his face. As I approached him, he quickly mumbled," I'm going to the bathroom", and ran off. I looked at Hunter and Cameron and said, "I'll be back", before running up the stairs. As I walked up the stairs, he walked past me and pushed my shoulder. I was so done with him by now so I just walked into my room and sat at my vanity. I still don't wear make up, only on occasions sometimes. It took me forever to find my yellow scrunchie but eventually I did and put my hair up in a messy bun. Before walking out, I grabbed my black RayBans because why not? Everyone was laughing now and all have arrived. We were planning on spending the day at the boardwalk which brought back bad memories for me. "Finally after three years, she comes downstairs", Hayes states as everyone walks to the door to leave. I glared at him, then jumped on his back making him fall down. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry", he kept on repeating curling up into a ball. I laughed before hopping on Hunter's back as we took the elevator downstairs. The limo was waiting downstairs but Cameron told everyone that we are taking his car before pulling me away. I was so confused but got even more confused when he started walking in the direction of DQ. "Let's remake the first day I adopted you instead", he said without looking at me. I smiled big before saying,"Okay but let's drive there instead of getting sunburn". We both chuckled as we went down to the underground garage. Hunter kept on texting me so I told him to tell everyone that we aren't going to the beach with them anymore. We were eating ice cream when I started to sing out-loud without even noticing. When I finished singing 'Back to Black', I looked up and noticed everyone was staring at me in silence.
(A/N: Song attached at the starting of the chapter if you wanted to hear her sing her cover.)
My face turned red and I was about to cover it when I saw someone I haven't seen in forever approaching us. My jaw dropped as I ran up to Shawn and tackled him in a hug before noticing Camilla Cabello standing behind him. "Hey", we both whispered before separating from our long hug. I shyly waved at Camilla who waved back with a big smile before Shawn spoke up. "You never told me you can sing?" He said with his big smile. "That's because I never really sing in front of people I quietly said while blushing harder. I felt Cameron's arms wrap around me and he kissed my cheek before saying in a baby tone, "Aww my baby girl is blushing". I slapped his chest as we all walked out together and made our way towards the boardwalk. After saying our goodbyes, Cameron threw me over his shoulder and said,"Why didn't you tell me that you sing?" I laughed and he chuckled before speaking again. "I heard you sing many times before but decided to wait until you told me. Where you even planning on telling me anytime soon?" He asked after putting me down and walking to the other side of the car. I shrugged before opening the passenger door and hopping in. "There's a certain song you always sing but what's it about?" He asked while getting in. I couldn't help but smile really hard at the question as i put on my seatbelt on. When I faced front, I noticed Cameron carefully watching me so I quickly stopped smiling. "I saw that look, is ssssomeone in loveeeeee?" He asked me while poking my arm. I couldn't tell him because the truth is, it was about Jack and I was still dating Hunter right now. My heart started to beat faster at the thought of his face so I quickly pushed the thought away. "What are you?" He asked in a more serious tone while stopping the car and facing me again. I let out a huge breath because I couldn't keep it in anymore and turned to face him. " I wrote the song about Jack because I couldn't and still can't get him off my mind and that's why I sing it all the time because I think I love him but I'm dating Hunter and don't know what to do anymore because Jacob's cheating ass isn't over me", I said really fast in one breath before covering my mouth. He looked at me with wide eyes before saying,"Surprisingly, I understood what you said". We got home and both ran to change because we had to drive to the airport for Magcon in New Jersey. I pulled out my black adidas track pants, Cameron Dallas hoodie, and camo green SnapBack because they were so comfortable. On my way out, I grabbed my luggages, laptop bag, and water bottle before sitting on the couch and waiting. Cameron came downstairs and grabbed his car keys off the counter while saying something but stopped when he saw me. I looked up at him and noticed why; we were wearing the same thing with black nike roshes. We both laughed really hard because of how often this happens.
*On the airplane*
I was sitting next to Cameron and felt his eyes watching me as I was deep in thought on what to do about my feelings. Cameron was listening to 'Hotline Bling' on replay beside me and I was so annoyed with his love for that song. Dylan was on the other side of me and kept on singing, "I got hot sauce in my bag, swag", over and over again because he didn't know the rest of the lyrics. Just as I was gonna tell Dylan to shut up, Cameron whispered to me,"I think you should tell Jack your feelings, and if he doesn't feel the same then try and stop to." I turned and stared at him before saying, "And what if he does?" He replied out loud this time, "That's for you to figure out", before playing his music too fast for me to speak. I mumbled a sarcastic thanks before going to Jack's iMessage. I was about to tell him how I feel when he texted me. My heart stopped, then started beating so hard that I thought it would rip out my chest as I read the text.
Jack: I've been wanting to tell you for forever now but couldn't do it because I'm a wimp. Cara, I have deep feelings for you that I can't let go of.
I quickly replied by saying:
Me too but I'm dating Hunter. It's gonna be hard if I break up with him.
I noticed both, Dylan and Cameron, looking at our conversation from the corner of their eye so I got up and went to the bathroom. Me and Jack texted for a while and he convinced me that I should break up with Hunter if I feel the way I do. We got off the plane and I held Cameron's hand just like old times. Everyone was talking and I went to the bathroom because I didn't actually use it on the plane. As I turned the corner, I bumped into someone's hard chest who was a little taller than me. When I looked up to say sorry, I noticed it was Jack G with Johnson who had an evil smirk behind him. We both smiled at each other like idiots before he asked. "Did you do it yet?" When I was about to answer, I saw over Jack's shoulder that Hunter was kissing Loren up against the wall. I've always hated that hoe but thought they were just friends. Just as they pulled apart, Hunter saw me and his jaw dropped. He was about to come up to me but I pulled Jack's collar and kissed him. Jack looked shocked after and I smiled because I wasn't gonna beat myself up over someone so useless again. Jack and me talked about how they are going on tour before I said goodbye and went to the bathroom. When I came out, Cameron was leaning on the wall and looked mad staring at his phone. I approached him and before I could ask, he showed me a picture of Loren and Hunter kissing from earlier. "What's this?" He asked with anger traced in his voice. I explained everything to him and let's just say he said a couple of words that are banned from my vocabulary. When we arrived at the hotel, Cameron gave Hunter a piece of his mind before drowning me in even more, "Are you sure you're okay?" Questions. He then called Jack and gave him a super long speech about cheating on me and how it would 'benefit' him. I heard him walk in as I talked with Andrea and he jumped on my bed making me fly up. He kept on tickling me when I ignored him until I told Andrea that I'd talk to her tomorrow. "I just got off the phone and we are going to the studio in the morning to record your first song!" He said which caused me to drop my phone. "What was it called again?" He continued while picking up my phone and handing me it. "I-It's called 'Melodies'" l replied while stumbling over my words. I screamed really loud once I processed what he just told me which cause Hunter to run in from next door. I screamed even louder and threw my pillow at him so that he got the memo I don't want to see him which caused him to run out after I reached for the lamp. Cameron and me bursted into laughter so hard that I fell on the floor. After literally ten minutes of us laughing until we couldn't breath, I got up and walked towards the pillow. I could feel the sleep taking over me and I fell onto the pillow once I reached it, slowly drifting off. Cameron came and picked me up before tucking me into bed and turning off the tv. The door bursted open and Hayes and Daniel walked in. Hayes pointed at Daniel's white vans before saying, "Damn Daniel!" As tired as I was, I still laughed before me and Cameron threw them a death glare to get out. When the door clicked closed, my eyes lids became really heavy and that's the last thing I remember.
A lot has changed in the past time. I have sort of a stubble and a little longer hair. Cara's eyes were more green now and her hair was darker. We were both more tanned and I noticed her eyelashes are more curly and longer. I'm so surprised that she didn't care about Hunter cheating which made me notice how stronger she was now. I low key notice her taking a liking in Jack when they first met, but that's the only reason why I let her date before him. I knew eventually they would end up together and I'm probably more happy than the both of them because of their relationship now. It's different with him because I trust him and he is actually caring; they both are and deserve each other. Just as Cara started to drift off to sleep, she turned over and rested her head on my chest. I wrapped my arms around her and smiled at the thought of the last time she did that. It was the day after I picked her up and she couldn't sleep because everyone decided to watch her sleep. It's funny how something so long ago could feel like just yesterday. That day is one of my most treasured moments in life and I wouldn't trade the world for it. I remember the day she told me to paint, "God has a Plan", on her wall when I asked her what quote she wanted me to paint. I remember the day we both cried together in Andrea's guest room after she forgave me. All the good memories were coming back to me as I fell asleep. The last thing I remember thinking about was the day I met her.
Decided to change the cover and title since this book is more about Cameron than anyone else. I guess it just tool its own pathway and I couldn't stop it. Love you guys but be more active please? Comment in the book because I like talking with people and will most likely reply. Help me get to 300 reads and I will internally die because I think it isn't possible for how shitty this book is but it is my first one. Damn Daniel I'm gonna stop ranting and thank you to everyone who actually took time to read this. Love you cheekas!